I Moved From Canada. They Think I'm Slow, Eh?

Ah! If you’ve been feeling like Canada is getting taller, you’re only sort of right—it’s Chicago that’s getting shorter. Our fine city is sinking a millimeter every year (four inches per century). Canadian glaciers are melting, which disrupts the balance of certain landmasses, so stuff north of the G-Lakes is getting higher and stuff south (that’s us) is getting lower. Also, water is tipping from Canada to us, too.
This kind of reminds Chicagoist of that episode of (best show ever) Sports Night "Shoe Money Tonight", where Isaac is shrinking. So someday, Canadian glaciers will be playing poker against Chicago landmasses, and everyone will make inappropriate osteoporosis jokes.