Extra, Extra

• Three police officers are expected to surrender today on charges for that Jefferson Tap beatdown.
• In other Chicago-police-related news, an officer faces up to 14 years for fatally running down a teenager then trying to cover it up.
• CPS spent $50 million in federal money tutoring 56,000 students, but it didn't really help.
• Chicago comes in 7th in a ranking of cities with the most incidents of road rage.
• Brian Ulacher's jock strap was on Ebay for a while today. Surprise, surprise: No one bid on it.

"the douchebag in his natural habitat" via brantastic, who shares our same opinion when she expresses disgust over "his 'it ain't gonna suck itself' tank top! his tan! his muscles! his beer! his tank top again! oh my god i want to kick him in the neck! and let's kick his friend, too."