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A Waukegan apartment was burglarized recently, which we're sure happens from time to time, but this thieves stole more than just ordinary valuables. They stole a porn stash. (Not to be confused with a porn stache.)
The 39-year-old [man], who lives in an apartment in the 800 block of Berwick Boulevard, told police thieves took nearly 40 pornographic DVDs. The collection included 30 assorted titles and a 10-disc box set of ethnic-specific movies. Thieves also took a $200 DVD player.
All cred to My Cube... for that headline. Brilliant.
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"Thieves Jack Wack Stack"
excellent...I can imagine the guy coming home and noticing there's been a break in, then methodically searching his place to see what had been taken, all the while pleading outloud to know one in particular, and maybe God, "Not the porn, not the porn, not the porn, not the p...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
OK, I can't not use that now....
"go away ... 'batin."
I like it better with the new headline.
jmagic...is that from Idiocracy?
sure is thoms.
That's hilarious. "10-disc box set of ethnic-specific movies." It takes a certain set of balls (pun-intended) to report such a thing. Now they're blue.
HA ha!
Thank you, Margaret!
I try to always be servicy :-)
I love the new headline. It makes me feel like I was reading an issue of The Hollywood Reporter that focused solely on angry masturbators.
This headline lead me to believe I'd be reading about the theft of a mobster's personal library pertaining to homicide or perhaps about someone hacking into a mainframe and pilfering a particularly outlandish, i.e. whack, set of data.
Lets try to keep it together, eh Chicagoist?