45 Chicago People, Places and Ideas That Get Us Going

By Margaret Lyons in Miscellaneous on May 21, 2008 5:36PM

May is National Masturbation Month, so in honor of what we like to think of as our real national pastime (plenty of people find baseball boring), we've compiled a list of things about Chicago that turn us, and the friends we polled, on.

You know, for when you need to take a drive down Wacker...

• Sitting at bar in the back room at Lula, where you can see the group of smokin' hot chefs stand shoulder to shoulder and cook delicious food.
• The Ladies of the Brown and Blue Lines
• Spring cleavage
• The Windy City Rollers
• Shirtless boys in the park
• Watching a storm roll in or out over the lake
• The baristas of Intelligentsia
• People-watching at the MCA
• Girls eating candy at The Burlington
• Sunbathers at the Addison totem pole
• The footlong dog at Murphy's
• The milfs, realtors and pharmaceutical reps at the LP Panera at lunchtime - more hot blondes in suits than an episode of CSI: Miami
• Girls playing beach volleyball in bikinis at North Ave. Beach
• Art Fairs
• Watching girls butts on either the L or the bus. Or on the street.
• The 151 bus
• The name "Amy St Eve"
• Seeing Manny Flores on the El
• Full color arm sleeve tattoos! Yowza!
• The supersexy waiters all over Southport that develop little beads of sweat on their foreheads as they're hustling between the inside and the outdoor patios they're serving
• Sweaty girls in bands playing on low stages or the floor
• Baseball players' butts. More specifically, baseball pitchers'.
• Reading the X matches in the reader classifieds
• The men in various choruses around town. They sing well, they wear tuxedos, they perform in churches.
• Typing "Daddy" into the erotic services search on Chicago Craigslist
• Seeing someone having sex in an apartment as I ride past on the El
• Brunettes named Brandi that wear Mark Buehrle jerseys and pink White Sox hats
• The Art Institute kids whenever there's a film lecture screening at the Siskel
• Drinking at the Green Mill
• The Cultural Center
• Manny's
• Charleston Pub
• Hopleaf
• Violet Hour
• The Hideout
• Simon's
• Ten Cat
• The Smurfit-Stone Building
• Powell's Bookstore
• The Music Box
• Spice House
• The dinosaur gallery at the Field
• The Seminary Co-op
• Bobtail soda fountain
• Chicago flag tattoos

Photo via Mike Mertz