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In the midst of many Happy Halloweeners scrambling to find last minute costumes and the best deal on fun-size candy, today the Trib outed their crotchety counterparts - the Halloween Scrooges. Sure it's fun to get all gussied up, be someone else for the night and gorge on lots of sugary drinks and chocolately snacks, but sometimes we wonder if it's really all worth it. Isn't it really just a night out, but higher-maintenance? A lot of times Halloween is built up to be one of the most rockin' party nights of the year, but in the end all you have to show for it is a puked-on rental costume you can't return and a hangover. As Trib interviewee Alex DiGiacinto put it, "If you hate Halloween, people take that as an opinion that you hate fun..I like fun. I just don't have it on the 31st." In kicking our various Friday plans around the Chicagoist offices, we determined we have a love/hate relationship with Halloween hullaballoo. Should we get in the spirit and party hardy, or hole up in our darkened houses and whip water balloons at trick-or-treaters? Here's how our decision-making process went:
PRO: A chance to get your friends together and theme yourselves out in group costume.
CON: Being forced to dress as one of the Village People.
PRO: Super cute costume that outshines any party clothes in your closet.
CON: Freezing your ass off in it.
PRO: Your partner makes you dress up as Raggedy Andy.
CON: Your partner dresses up as Slutty Raggedy Ann.
PRO: Slutty Halloween costumes.
CON: Heightened sexual frustration.
PRO: The chance to be really inventive with your costume choice.
CON: Costume contests won by someone stringing single-serving cereal boxes together, dressed as a "cereal killer."
PRO: It's a good night for drinking.
CON: The drinks are usually something "Halloweeny."
PRO: Seeing some really creative costumes.
CON: Drunk people feeling obligated to try to be even funnier.
PRO: Free candy.
CON: Free candy.
PRO: Hiding under a mask for total hook-up anonymity.
CON: Not knowing if the person you're groping is butt-ugly.
The jury's still out.
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PRO: All the Halloween "walk-of-shames" the morning of November 1st. There's nothing funnier than seeing an embarrassed, beer-soaked, messy-haired "Sexy _______" trying to get a cab at 8am.
CON: If it's you.
Halloween is hot like fire, so all the haters step to the left.
PRO: Halloween jail. Sitting in a cell next to a boozy SpongeBob.
CON: If it's you.
Hahahaha. Amy, we LURVE Halloween Jail!
I've always loved Halloween. But then again, my birthday is the next day. I mean, when you are a kid, and one day you get to wear a costume and get candy, and the next you get cake and presents, you will totally love both your whole life.
I love the Halloween "Roseanne" shows.
Lots of people around where I live put up some pretty awesome Halloween displays. I'm too lazy...it's always fun to put up, but too much of a hassle to take down.
PRO ~ Halloween haunted houses. Even if the show is produced by high school kids, it's still fun to see and get scared....Old horror movies through the month of October on TCM....and kids coming to trick-or-treat and looking cute even when they're dressed up as something scary.
CON ~ Slutty costumes: nurses, french maids, belly dancers, cops ("I'm Miss Demeanor!"), schoolgirls, etc. These skanks have got to go. Halloween is like New Year's Eve for women with low self-esteem.
CON: Teaching children to beg.
every single close friend i've ever had lists halloween as "their favorite holiday."
i'm throwing a party this year, cause i like to have parties. but honestly, i don't like halloween.
1. i hate being scared. i'd never go to a haunted house.
2. i hate being scared. i don't watch horror movies.
3. SAW V or VI or whatever the fuck. those movies are disgusting and i don't know what people get out of them.
4. while most people are surprised to hear i don't like halloween -- they figure i'll love to dress up -- the thing is, i'm a lazy perfectionist. i hate that i have to try and come up with something clever or whatever ...i want my costume to be something people fawn over. yet, i'm a lazy ass who normally whips something up the day of.
5. the only time that i've ever planned an outfit (this year, the joker. way cliche, but i'm obsessed), i've been worrying about getting all the right parts since.
6. candy corn. that shit is awful, yet i try and convince myself once a year that it *might* be different this time. and it never is. one time, when i was dosing with some friends, we decided that each piece of candy corn has 1,000 witches souls in it. 'nuff said.
7. sexy/slutty _______. let's be honest, if i had the body, i'd probably wear something a *little* more exciting. but i don't, and i'm bummed (realize it's my own fault).
8. i always feel guilty that i don't stay home and hand out candy to the neighborhood kids.
i think that suffices. but really, i love for other people to get whipped up about it. to an extent. cause
9. i can't stand it when my friends are asking "what are you going to be for halloween" in august. seriously?
PRO: Seeing all the drunk sexy ______S stumbling around in high heels.
CON: If it's your mom.
PRO: Cool pumpkin carvings.
CON: Those same pumpkins smashed all over the sidewalk/street the next morning, or...
CON: Carved pumpkins sitting out well past Halloween, either melting into a puddle of goo or rotting completely and stinking up the joint.