Chicagoist: Winter Parking Warning

clarenceweatherspoon

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 13:43:29 -0600

One side benefit: I'm pretty sure this towing policy has prevented at least a few drunken-driving crashes... If someone parks on say, Milwaukee, and goes to say, Nick's Awfulgarden until close, at least they won't be able to compound their mistake-filled evening by driving home all wasted.

BlueFairlane

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:39:57 -0600

As seems required by this thread, before making my point I must make a personal declaration of my preference for biking, my tendency to do it year-round, and my ownership of a car used primarily for long trips out of town and sometimes for grocery store jaunts down the Clyborn corridor. Unlike others, though, I see this as personal choice based on personal circumstance and see no reason to castigate others who make other choices. That out of the way, I must state my agreement with Mr. Stealth that the evil car gods of the city have a point with all their draconianism. We are a city of millions, after all, so there must be systems in place to insure people aren't parking all willy-nilly, or that the streets aren't lined with junkers taking space that others might need to use. By choosing to drive and own a car, we have to accept the reality of where we live. Some do this by moving their cars a lot. Some, like me, do this by paying extra rent for off-street parking. Only the foolish expect to park their car indefinitly anywhere in a city like this without paying some kind of price.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:37:00 -0600

Stepping back from my silly bugger self for just one post, I really don't hate Matilda, or anyone on here. Really. I love a good winding argument, a bit of shouting and scowling and jibes on both sides, but there's no anger here. Matilda seems like a very smart, decent and quite clever person. I had a friend who was equally chiding and wise. On more than one occasion I've wondered if Matilda and my old friend Jean are one and the same. Ah well, raise a glass to mystery!

Ingrid

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:27:45 -0600

Albany, oh well....I guess that we'll just have to be content to let the mystery be...but it would have been nice, for once, not to be personally involved in the drama....

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:22:54 -0600

Ingrid, I'd be delighted. Sadly, I fear any house plants you have would wilt and your pets would catch on fire from the sheer rhetorical bombast. Like the Lincoln/Douglas debates. But without all that content and historical significance.

jimbo

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:22:03 -0600

Quit. Feeding. The. Troll.

Ingrid

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:14:34 -0600

Okay, instead of Thanksgiving with the fam this year, I will forsake that drama to invite Albany and Matilda over for this year's holiday repast. What say, you two?

Tower18

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:14:15 -0600

I think it's ridiculous that they can post signs about regular street cleaning 4/1-10/31, and then randomly whenever they want to, clean the streets again after 10/31, with very little notice.

Stealth

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:14:00 -0600

I say this as somebody who both drives and bikes. Me too, and throw public transportation into that mix. That being said, I don't have a REAL big problem with these Byzantine city parking/car ownership laws. Yeah, it's a pain in the ass to pay the city and state fees every year. and yes, the occasional parking ticket is a drag. But I know where and where not to park in the winter and street cleaning season. I know when to get up in the morning to move my car from in front of a parking meter (You have to move it by 8 and I'm out of the house for work by 7 anyway, so...). I'm usually able to find parking on the side streets around my place (Edgewater/Bryn Mawr) relatively easy so I can leave it there during the week and do what I have to do with it on the weekend. I realize some places are more congested than others (Lincoln Park, Lakeview, etc.) so I guess I'm lucky. It's not that big of a burden to move my car to avoid getting a ticket. Even with the city vultures circling all the time.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:08:34 -0600

How to Be Matilda (in 7 Tedious Steps) -Attempt to broaden the topic to the point of incoherence. ("I agree with you about Thai food being good, but what about the plight of East Asian refugees") -Chastise any attempts or displays of intellectual rigor or wit. (Like Harrison Burgeron, we must wear sandbags, dress in sackcloth and hairshirts.) -Criticize the nuance of arguments without actually citing any facts. Bonus points for acting offended at salty language or rejoinders. -Don't be above hypocrisy. Feel free to swear and cuss at others, even while calling for calm and civility -Exist in a moral and experiential vacuum. People who share anecdotes are clearly WRONG. We are just brains in jugs. -Keep close tabs on the behavior of other commeters and don't be afraid to chastise them for stepping over moral lines that you have draw in invisible ink. Alone. At Night. -Show a grim humorlessness in the face of any attempt to mitigate an argument. Grudges are a source of much solace. Sounds really meaningful. I'm an absurdist. Meaning is for poets.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:58:38 -0600

@Navin: You'll not get an argument from me that owning a car in the city comes with nothing shy of a automated debit for the Dept. of Revenue. But not everyone can bike and not everyone who drives is a mouth-breathing sociopath who wants nothing more than the death of anything on two-wheels. Perhaps it was living in Wicker Park that made my hackles raise at the sniffery of some bike enthusiasts. I bike, I drive and take the CTA. It's just a method of transportation.

matilda

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:57:48 -0600

Bored now, Albany. As self-proclaimed court jester, your prime duty is to entertain us. Get back to it. We meet, we drink, we screw. Sounds really meaningful.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:52:49 -0600

Why yes it is. I do enjoy how under your skin I've gotten. Do you think of me when you're away from the computer? I'm curious how far you want to take this whole rivalry thing? I offered you my e-mail, you never deigned to reply. But let me retort: --Change subject to self (I've never driven ...), which is always the prime theme of Albany posts. I am my favorite subject. --Accuse others of being self-righteous or banal or trite or disingenuous or merely, and perhaps forgivably, ignorant of great truths long ago discerned by Albany. How dare I be enlightened. Better to moulder in the dark. --Insert some cheap alliteration ("grade school giggles") Actually, I love alliteration. It's the shameful sorry state of Chicago conversation that we can't have more poetical paeons and festive flourishes of vituperous verbage. I'll confine my remarks to grunts and squeaks. --Attempt personal insult (jamoke) because, after all, ideas are boring with labels. But at least it's a fun insult. ---Insert quote from other poster who has earned Albany's attention for the day. I like blockquotes. Without threading it keeps things in a line. ---Accuse poster of not being up to Albany standards ("so very tired"--usually, the other poster comes to "a battle of wits unarmed", an odd use of cliche for someone so obviously witty) I love that expression. Along with "They hold me contempt, but I think them beneath it." or "You've clearly brought a knife to this gunfight". Though I will endeavor to be move vicious if you like. --Accuse other poster of drinking too early in the day (bonus points for changing the booze from time to time, though--at least he/she keeps it varied--granted, some of us do drink early in the day, and most of us want to drink earlier in the day than we are able, but still ... ). Are you doing it alone? Friend of Bill? I'm a he. As far as my gynecologist knows. --Later will come the statement from Albany that he/she is bored, that it is all in good fun, even after line after line of personal attack, as though this is all part of his/her warmup for taking his/her comedy act to the Catskills, or as though there are not a million other things to do than "poke the bear." But Matilda, this IS all in good fun. Granted, this is not the Algonquin roundtable, but it's all a bunch of hooey and nonsense in the face of a cold, awful world. I don't take anything I say seriously. Even at my most strident I know I'm full of the most delightful musical fruit. --Perhaps, if the sun is shining bright that day, or the wind is from the southwest, Albany will share stories about being bullied, or being gay, or being vaguely Irish, or being from Chicago, or being related to cops, or knowing what a hammer is, or being a dutiful reader, or eating creamed corn straight from the can without heating it up first, in order to establish another layer or moral or intellectual superiority over the rest of the posters. Now that just feels a bit stalker-ish. I can't remember all your camoflage on here my love, but you seem to have a master list. I reiterate, this is my e-mail steampoweredboy (at) gmail (dot) com We meet, we drink, we screw. It is a new day, it is a new age.

Mary_Sunshine

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:50:42 -0600

Matilda, That post just made coming to the office today worthwhile. Merci.

Navin

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:42:27 -0600

Well Albany, You have to admit that Chicago's virtual "racket" of complex parking prohibitions and their arbitrary enforcement/fining structure are good reasons to not burden yourself with a vehicle. In Chicago a vehicle seems to be as much a city meal ticket as a method of transportation. I say this as somebody who both drives and bikes.

matilda

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:36:36 -0600

Could ask the same of you, sweetie.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:33:36 -0600

Slow day at the office honey?

matilda

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:31:24 -0600

Typical Albany post: --Change subject to self (I've never driven ...), which is always the prime theme of Albany posts. --Accuse others of being self-righteous or banal or trite or disingenuous or merely, and perhaps forgivably, ignorant of great truths long ago discerned by Albany. --Insert some cheap alliteration ("grade school giggles") --Attempt personal insult (jamoke) because, after all, ideas are boring with labels. ---Insert quote from other poster who has earned Albany's attention for the day. ---Accuse poster of not being up to Albany standards ("so very tired"--usually, the other poster comes to "a battle of wits unarmed", an odd use of cliche for someone so obviously witty) --Accuse other poster of drinking too early in the day (bonus points for changing the booze from time to time, though--at least he/she keeps it varied--granted, some of us do drink early in the day, and most of us want to drink earlier in the day than we are able, but still ... ). --Later will come the statement from Albany that he/she is bored, that it is all in good fun, even after line after line of personal attack, as though this is all part of his/her warmup for taking his/her comedy act to the Catskills, or as though there are not a million other things to do than "poke the bear." --Perhaps, if the sun is shining bright that day, or the wind is from the southwest, Albany will share stories about being bullied, or being gay, or being vaguely Irish, or being from Chicago, or being related to cops, or knowing what a hammer is, or being a dutiful reader, or eating creamed corn straight from the can without heating it up first, in order to establish another layer or moral or intellectual superiority over the rest of the posters. I hope I didn't miss anything. After all, it's all in good fun. Oh yeah, forget: Cars suck, dude. Yeah!

JD84

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:25:05 -0600

Yeah I found out last year that Winchester is one of those streets which plows sort of ignore for a while. Don't have to worry about towing. Thank god for all wheel drive on my Subaru, last year I actually needed it to get out of some spots (especially when the plow did decide to come by). Maybe I should get some studded tires for the bike though.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:08:15 -0600

Really? I've never driven an SUV and have taken the CTA since grade school giggles. Aren't you the jamoke who gave away a car for a bicycle? Making a big show of your choice in transportation is so very tired. I am both more eco-friendly than you AND have destroyed more environment than you!! I see we've started in on the brandy early.

JoeM500

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:54:09 -0600

pppshhhhhhhh!!!!! I drove an SUV for years and years and years... I am both more eco-friendly than you AND have destroyed more environment than you!! haha, no smug here, dude.

Albanyparkour

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:36:06 -0600

And here comes the trite and predictable car hate. Yes, everyone should bicycle all year long. God, the smug bullshit just reeks to high heaven. It's a method of transportation and different people have different needs. I grew up near that strip of north Kedzie. It's the salt dump and it's right by the bus barn on foster. We always had clear streets up there. So school was almost never canceled. Yeah that sucked growing up.

JoeM500

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:19:24 -0600

I live on one of the routes. I have seen how crazy it gets when the second hand clicks two hours before a Bears game... literally, dozens of cars towed in 20 minutes! Just another good thing about not owning a car!

accessofdiesel

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:10:01 -0600

You should really car-share....