Deal or No Deal: The Blago Show

Photo illustration by Samantha Abernethy

Despite the fact that he already has terrific ratings in his reality show "the news," Rod Blagojevich is requesting permission from the judge to allow him to go to Costa Rica in June to film a "Swiss Family Robinson"-style reality show for NBC called, "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!" Blago will be dropped in the middle of the jungle with nine other celebrities, including Nancy Kerrigan, and they will compete for food and supplies. Viewers will vote people off, and Blago would make $80,000 per episode. The show's website says, "The last remaining star will be crowned King or Queen of the Jungle, winning a substantial cash prize for their favorite charity." Yeah, I'm sure Blago would give that money to charity. The Friends of Blago Fund or The Fuckin' Golden Foundation.

We here at Chicagoist have some better ideas for Blago reality shows, though.

Extreme Makeover to change that hairdo, and maybe some "What Not to Wear" to get rid of those track suits.

The Amazing Race Blago racing from an angry mob of citizens in each town he visits.

Temptation IslandBlago can bring his friends Burris, Davis and Jackson with him. Add a Senate seat and see what happens!

Wife Swap He's got this wife, and she's fuckin' golden.

The Bachelor Blagojevich and ten senatorial candidates frolic at a secluded ranch. Blago gives a rose to his chosen ones.

I Love New York If nothing else, we want to know what nickname she'd give him. Anything like "Midget Mac" or "Tailor Made?"

The Bad Guvs' Club He already has the swearing down. Maybe Eliot Spitzer will go on with him.

Keeping Up With the Blagojeviches

Intervention Although perhaps "Interrogation" would be more fitting.

The Cougar Well, what else is Patti going to do while he's gone?

The Apprentice He surely would give Omorosa a run for her money in the scheming portion of the competition.

The Biggest Loser Well, he just is.