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As every good foodie knows, each new and exciting trend produces plenty of stale, unexciting hangers-on. Exposure quickly dampens our enthusiasm, but even lasting trends are hurt by the legions of high-priced, low-quality imitators. I've seen this happen with cupcakes, creme brulee, bacon, boutique pizza - and now it's happening with cocktails. Recently, I've been ripped off by a lot of bad cocktails, and it's reaching the level of a trend.
Let's be clear: I'm not complaining that every corner bar doesn't have an in-house mixologist. I'm also not complaining about the cocktail trend; it's one I happen to love and write about. I'm exceedingly happy that Americans are being reminded that there is more to drink than light beer and bad vodka. But, in a city where you can get one of the best cocktails in the world at the Violet Hour (for $12) and have a master mixologist make your cocktail tableside at The Drawing Room (also for $12), how can bad $14 cocktails be explained away? At Trader Vic's, a perennial Chicagoist favorite, you can get a great cocktail for $9 - what's the excuse?
Sometimes, one expects to be overcharged. If you're having a drink at the Signature Room, you're renting space at the top of the world. If you order a martini at Charlie Trotters, you probably don't care about the price. On the other hand, when I walk into an average 2-star restaurant and get charged $14 for a martini, I want to go beat the bartender over the head with a bottle. If the martini is bad, as it often is, the situation deteriorates. A decent $14 cocktail is a mild insult; a bad $14 cocktail is a slap in the face.
Now that every restaurant feels the need to have a cocktail menu, sometimes the evil is more transparent. Recently, before looking at a menu, I ordered a Sidecar at a relatively posh, well-established Chicago restaurant. A venerable old cocktail, the Sidecar is classically made with Brandy or Cognac, Cointreau and Lemon Juice. I got my Sidecar (which cost me $13) and almost spit it out - it was so badly made that I wouldn't have been able to recognize the drink blindfolded. When I looked at the menu, the cocktail was listed, and described as a combination of an anonymous Brandy, Dekuyper Orange Liqueur and Sour Mix. Bottom shelf liquor and sour mix out of a gun, and for this they charged $13? AND they admitted it? Standards need to be reestablished.
A few hints to avoid this silliness. If you want to drink cocktails and the restaurant has a cocktail menu, pay attention to what they're putting in your drinks. If a drink is more than $8, it had better have high quality ingredients and fresh juices. If they're not clear, feel free to ask the waiter or bartender. If they don't have a bartender, and random waitstaff are mixing drinks, don't pay top shelf prices - you're paying for the craft as much as the ingredients. Don't hesitate to ask about prices in advance - often, cocktail prices aren't on the menu, leading to an unhappy surprise later on. Lastly, return often to those restaurants and bars that do a great job at a reasonable price. Let them know you appreciate it and pad their bottom line - hopefully, they won't be tempted to jump on the high-price bandwagon.
Photo by swanksalot
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Nice rant. I ordered a Miller Lite and a shot of Beam and almost choked when he asked for $13.
I never felt so ripped off buying a drink as I did on the terrace at the Conrad hotel. I waited literally 20-25 minutes each time to get served drinks at the bar and paid almost $16 per mojito. The first one I got tasted fine 9though not really worth $16), but the second one was pretty bad. The long lines were the only thing keeping me from demanding a new drink. I hate when there's inconsistency like that in a bar. I realize they have multiple bar tenders, but they should all be trained to make a drink the same way. One reason I usually stick to beer when out is that at least you know what you'll get for the money...
My only disappointment is that you didn't name names. Ripoffs need to be called out so they can be shamed into changing their evil ways. Honestly if I get to a restaurant and it's clear that I'll be gouged, I stick with buying beer in a bottle.
Also: just to put my money where my mouth is, I've had better cocktails at the L & L than at Emerald Loop!
Ordered two 16-ounce Rickard's Reds in the Toronto airport not too long ago. It's the equivalent of a Sam Adams here in the US, I guess. The bill was 24 bucks. AND they were served in some cheapass plastic mugs.
I get you on the asking-what-liquor-you-use thing, but I always feel like a cheap rube if I ask too many questions about one cocktail, as if the bartender is thinking, "If you have to ask all of these questions, maybe you shouldn't be drinking here." I think we all have bartender friends and heard them complain about customer who are so picky or complain about the price of a drink, etc. etc. etc. So you don't want to be "that guy". But that's probably just me.
this should become a weekly feature naming names to keep people honest! if i have an overpriced bad drink, i don't return to the establishment. does anyone notice a switcheroo at times when it comes to ordering top shelf or is it my imagination?
Yes, we have discussed just such a feature, to be called "Improperly Sauced." Keep your eyes peeled ...
I am with you 100%. And I am pleased to see you made your point while utilizing restraint and not singling any one destination out for this malfeasance.
Man up and tell us where it was.
I'll also add that if you did blind cocktail taste tests of "foodie" types using top and bottom shelf booze you'd likely get hilarious results.
No, I think it's better to not name names for a piece like this. It'd look like Anthony was picking on a single place instead of criticizing a disturbing and growing overall trend.
Fair dues,
It does kinda leave the reader hangin' though..
The NY Times food writers have done it before with thinks like Vodka and Bourbon. Hard liquor blind taste test results are always pretty interesting. Unsuprisingly, brands that are considered lower quality often score higher than top shelf quality brands during the blind tests.
Part of the problem with hard liquor is that many allegedly top shelf brands are only really "top shelf" because of extensive marketing campaigns, not the actual quality of the product itself (peoples obsession with absolute vodka is the perfect example of this). True of any product, really, but I think it is especially egregious with hard liquor.
One of the reasons I love Violet Hour is that they obviously select the liquor they use based on flavor profiles, not the spirits reputation in the liquor community. I never would have though that the best Old Fashioned I have ever had would have been made with Wild Turkey Rye.
Well that picture is of that margarita place on clark and belmont, though if you're ordering a sidecar from there I think there's something wrong with you.
I completely agree with the sentiment of this thread, however. But sometimes if you're not sure of something, it's best not to take the risk. Also, it's pretty hard to fuck up a corona with lime :D
I believe that's because the corona was eff'ed up before they put it in the bottle :)
Well, here's another situation where I'm shocked to learn something I thought was always pretty common and popular has suddenly been labeled a trend. The same thing happened to me with bacon.
But I have to ask who in their right mind would spend $14 on a single cocktail, regardless of the liquor it's made with. That's just dumb.
I might pay $14 for a cocktail made with bacon... mmmmm.... bacon.
Chuck?
Well, Osteria via Stato and Nacional 27 (Both Adam Seger-run cocktail programs) have bacon-infused cocktails, to name two places.
I think I have Seger's Baconcello recipe at home somewhere. Maybe it's time to make some...
Here it is.
Vodka and bacon grease! Who wouldn't love that combination?
$15 cocktails are for the upper class who are too boring and too bored to figure out how to spend their money otherwise.
Well, how big is this cocktail we're talking about?
Upper class?
How about sucker class!
LOL. Ah, I love class wars. Wake me when we storm the Bastille.
This post needs a follow-up examining the highway robbery that is rampant in nearly every music venue in Chicago. God bless the Empty Bottle, the only venue I drink at during shows.
I agree! Worst offenders: House of Blues (expected) and Metro (with their 'no free water' and cheapest beer is a $6 crappy draft).
The Aragon and the Logan Square auditorium are 2 more places who won't even give you a plastic cup. Bottled water is $4 at Logan Sq, and a CUP OF ICE WATER is THREE DOLLARS at the Aragon.
I was just at the Aragon to see the Pixies and wondering why it's always so hot in there...think I just figured out their scam.