7 Things Straight People Need To Know Before Going To The Gay Pride Parade

Dude The article is funny and cool...Im not sure why anyone is getting so huffy about it! Chill, relax, wax on wax off! I was IN the Houston Pride Parade tonight...Im straight, it was my 1st time going and one of my very dear friends asked me to walk with his group, so heck yes I went. It was amazing! My high light of the night was when a girl came out of the sidelines and gave me a big hug and told me her and her GF were proud of me. I didn't start rambling "im not gay, im straight"...I said "thank you" and gave her a huge hug back! 2 of my friends (2 guys) had their 4 yr old daughter walking with them, it was perfect!

I had friends say "arent you afraid people are going to think you're gay for being in the parade" or "you might get hit on by lesbians" or "don't catch gay"...seriously, their attitude made me wanna show my support to my gay friends even more!! I couldn't have cared less if someone though I was gay. I wasnt mauled by packs of lesbians. It was amazing to see some brave people out there strutting their stuff, Im sorry but the parade did nothing but make me appreciate the fact that everyone should be treated equal even more!

Eventhough you are a straight gay or not, what matters most is that as long as you're happy of what you're doing then, I think there's nothing to worry about. Just be true to yourself!
Fake Bake

I've been to Pride in Long Beach, CA.  Nothing even remotely close to this.  What the heck are you guys doing in chi-town??  ;-)

I think it's amazing that when someone pointed out that if a kiss is unwanted, then it's not respectful, was slammed for being intolerant and basically a poor sport.  Isn't that just gigantic hypocrisy?  I can be who I am but you can't be who you are.  I've noticed that very young gay men sometimes haven't quite figured out what tolerant means.  They confuse it with unconventional or they believe that it is something that should be practiced in regards to them, but don't realize it is something that they should practice.  
It's the narcissism of youth.    

Let me put it another way, take a look at this comment:"And ladies, if a Dyke on Bike goes in for a little lip-lock, we suggest you go ahead and let her." If we were talking about the St. Patrick's Day parade and the Irish Brotherhood Motorcycle Club, would anyone here be surprised if this statement created a firestorm of controversy? So then why in the context of the Pride Parade is it suddenly okay?
The Pride parade is all about being who you are and others respecting who you are, and that works both ways.

For such a joyful event this thread is relentlessly unjoyful. I an pretty sure the "guide" was meant to be jokey. I don't think it is actually advocating this sort of behavior.

And young male straights have similar problems understanding that not every woman is in to them. It is, indeed, the narcissism of youth. If youths who are narcissistic freak you out, avoid this, the beaches south of Irving Park, and most clubs and sporting events. Sheesh.

You know, when I posted I did think to myself that a lack of understanding of those terms was not limited to young gay men, and that I should edit it, but laziness prevented.  You're absolutely right on that note, I should have rephrased that.  Mea culpa.
However, the article does not get a pass for saying something ignorant just because it was meant to be fun.  People say ignorant things every day and expect to be given a pass because it was said, "in fun".  Unsolicited physical attention is never okay.  Ever.  Even in lighthearted articles, and the writer needs to know that.  So I'm a killjoy for saying it.  Fine, I'm alright with that.  It's still not okay.

agreed, you are a killjoy.

You're right, the klan used to show up to black power rallies too.

Sorry, i'm just a kid playing with matches with this point. If you wanna show up and have a pissing contest, i think you'll find a few takers. and i don't think the IBMC will be trying to kiss anyone random anytime soon. kinda not their thing. 2 totally different parades, btw.

What are you talking about?  The klan showed up a black power rallies to disrespect the participants.  I'm talking about people who show up at a parade to show support to the participants.  That's EVERYONE who shows up, gay, straight, and in between.  

Let me be even more clear that my problem is not with the parade!  I find that in real life, the average person knows that kissing a random stranger without their consent is, as another poster said,  universally uncool.  My problem is not with the article itself.  I think tip #2 is useful and helpful.  My problem is with the wording of tip #5.  I know the writer is basically trying to say relax and have good time, but they do that by suggesting that attendees need to be okay with unsolicited physical attention.  That is never true in any situation and I think it's important to say so.  It's not an attack on the pride parade, it's just calling that particular statement to task, and that is all.

Who is that angry gay in the picture?!  Why isn't he smiling?

haha :-) xoxo Brad

Why are gays proud about sticking their thing where they do...? Never understood why they wanted to be proud about that... they even want to have parades because of it?  pretty odd when you think about it, really...

I'm not gay, but I'm proud about sticking my thing where I can get someone to let me stick it.

Really? You never heard of Stonewall? At least look it up before you make an ass of yourself. 

LOL, ass of yourself... such a punster, you are... I get it...

The definition of stonewall did nothing for me, really... however, I found the information about "The Stonewall Riots" on wikipedia interesting and informative... 

unfortunately this information is simply not known by the vast majority of the non-gay public, which makes these parades appear to be nothing more than celebrations of sexual practices which have gone well overboard, and beyond any modicum of decency...

Perhaps if the Stonewall Riots were mentioned in the media at some point, or those parading were to emphasize the riots rather than making it all about and only about their sexual activities the public would be made far more aware and be more understanding... with the emphasis being only on deviant sexual activities, however, it is distasteful and the cause of embarrassment and resistance to those who do not share such values... being targeted and persecuted is a far more understandable cause which endears sympathy quite easily, while flaunting ones sexual preferences simply does not.

Pride Week may coincide with Stonewall's anniversary, but bullshit if most of the parade has anything to do with Stonewall. Come on now. It's a party, and because of Stonewall people at the party have to worry somewhat less about being harassed, but otherwise it has dick to do with Stonewall. All puns intentional.

Bullshit. Before Stonewall, people could be arrested for what amounts to a modest PDA by straights. And, I seriously doubt you have personally experienced similar sort of oppression or  discrimination. If gays celebrate by going over the top in public one day a year to recognize the end of such oppression, I'm all for it. 

I am willing to bet that if we took a poll of the participants in the parade we would have something MUCH less than 100% who realized the parade was supposed to be explicitly tied to Stonewall. I realize how important Stonewall was and is, but I call bullshit on the explicit link you are positing.

P.S. whether I have ever been subject to arrest for "modest PDA" is irrelevant. Frankly, I SERIOUSLY doubt you ever have been either. Just chill out and enjoy the party.

Dude, can you read?

I said you have not likely experienced such oppression. I did not suggest you may have been subject to arrest for a PDA. I know I have not been subject to such oppression (never said I was).  I can certainly understand how such oppression, once overcome, can lead to the joyous, over the top celebration that makes this parade such fun.  You see? That was my point.  YOU don't know what it was like to live as a gay person before Stonewall. You don't know what it s like to be criminalized for who you are. The Pride Parade is a celebration of this.

What percentage of correct answers on a Stonewall quiz would be sufficient for you to admit Stonwall is a significant event recognized by this weekend's event?  Anything less than 100 percent  OK? And, what the fuck would that have to do with anything? 

20% would impress me, jack hole. You don't count as one.

I suppose your ignorance is a kind of oppression. It must be tough.

I am not sure what you are so pissed about. I didn't criticize the parade or anything that happens at it. I also didn't criticize anything having to do with Stonewall. I said I did not believe that most paraders are conscious of the connection. It's like saying that most Mardi Gras revelers are not familiar with the Catholic roots of the party.

On the other hand, you do seem to need to be pissed and oppressed to enjoy the weekend, so feel free.

Not pissed at all. Just calling bullshit on your bullshit. You are the one who said "it may coincide with" the parade is same weekend of Stonewall anniversary. The parade is this weekend specifically because it is the anniversary of Stonewall. The commenter, since removed, wondered why the parade was such a big deal (it is more than being proud of where you stick your thing,as said commenter said). It is like asking why the Thanksgiving Day parade is held on Thanksgiving.

Just to interject, if I could.. I think what D's saying is that there's probably a number of participants in the parade to whom it'd be news that it happens on the anniversary of Stonewall. That's got less to do with the nature of the whole topic than it does with the pretty understandable reality that there's just a lot of clueless people running around in this world.

I understand that perfectly and disagree. But, even if people parading don't know the anniversary, they know of the nature and scope of the past oppression. The extravagant behavior is often a direct response to that -- the rapturous overthrow of oppression is a theme.

Being a member of an oppressed group doesn't automatically imbue every single person in that group with an intimate or accurate knowledge of specific historical events and how they relate to a current one.

Look, at every single historically-backgrounded gathering of 450,000 people, you're going to have a few groups: Those who are intimately familiar with the details of the event's historical origins, those who are generally familiar, those who haven't the faintest clue, and some people who are just giant fucking idiots. I'll grant you that given the fact that this particular event relates specifically to the rights of a group of people who were oppressed, members of that group are going to have a better familiarity with the specific history than average, and that penultimate group is likely to be smaller at Sunday's parade than other ones. But that doesn't mean it won't exist.

And I'll agree with you that basically pretty much everybody involved is familiar with "the nature and scope of the past oppression" in general. But that's not what D was talking about; I think it's pretty clear he was talking specifically about Stonewall and whether or not people know the parade is related to it -- if they even know about it at all.

I don't see what the controversy here is. Some (many? most?) people are dumb, and like it or not some of them are gay and some of them will be there Sunday. [shrugs]

Edit: Put another way, just based on the large number of people, there's going to be a quantifiable contingent who can't spell Stonewall, let alone describe how it relates to the parade or "the nature and scope of the past oppression". KnowwhatImean?

Of course, the original post to which I replied has been removed (don't know why) -- which deletes necessary context for my replies. The original poster seemed to be questioning why gays might need/want a pride parade (said poster asked "why be proud about where you stick you thing"). My point being that Pride weekend is about more than that at its roots (Stonewall). And, I do believe most of the participants are very well aware of that.

Yeah, that adds some context... And I can see why a "Why do them gays gotta be all obnoxious about themselves!" bit of idiocy would touch off a flamewar.

That said, I still think D's point (that is, if I understand it correctly, that people are stupid and consequently there'll be more than a few at Sunday's parade who think that "Stonewall" is a reference to a mysterious, ancient stone monument in England) stands. And moreover, I think you and he are probably generally on the same page with respect to the oppression you're talking about.

That's one thing about ignorant people... They seem to do a pretty good job of pissing people off and pitting people against others with whom they actually agree.

google stonewall. they add a cool little graphic! first time i've seen that for a specific search.

I don't understand how this is specific to straight people. Couldn't this have this just been a guide for anyone attending the parade? Why is it assumed that a straight person has never been to the parade before?

I think it was meant to be slightly tongue-in-cheek (no pun intended).

"boredom and listlessness can set in. We recommend copious amount of PDA.
So, expect some respectful kisses and hugs from boys who like boys who
like girls who like boys (and sometimes girls)—and everyone in between."

Translation: if you're straight, stay away from the Pride Parade. You risk being sexually assaulted by people with neither respect for personal boundaries, nor tolerance for those who might themselves express tolerance without wanting to partake in sexual experimentation.

A respectful kiss is hardly sexual experimentation or molestation.  You seem like that type of person that probably should not go because of your questioning your own sexuality. 

Ehh, I don't think I'd say it rises to the level of "molestation" (or, really, even comes close, IMO... I think you can skip hiking-up your outrage pants) but I do know this: Randomly walking up to a person and trying to kiss them (I assume we're all talking on the lips, here) is... pretty universally not cool. Regardless of the gender, sexual orientation of the kisser/kissee, or environment in which it happens, it's just kinda rude and presumptuous and weird.

The prospect of a chick randomly trying to kiss me is less offputting than a guy trying it, I'll admit, but even still it'd be a bit... I dunno, off, IMO. Just a little too far outside convention to really be acceptable, even in this setting.

I think this is worth mentioning, too... I've been to the Pride Parade before, and I dunno, maybe I'm just a fugly straight dude, but I've never really thought that being targeted by a random drive-by-kiss was something that, like, would really happen. I dunno. [shrugs] Tempest in a teapot, perhaps.

Dude. I've known that I like girls since I was eleven. "Born this way" also counts for straights. If it's unwelcome by the recipient, "respectful" is the last thing a kiss is. And they are unwelcome to me because of the aforementioned liking girls bit. You're trying to cover for behavior which is at best boorish, and at worst sexual assault.

I don't think this guys going.

Haven't in years. Got sick of explaining that there's not a "because gay" exception to "no means no".

When I want to celebrate gay pride, I share a bottle of scotch with my gay friends, none of whom feel the need to act in ways college frat boys would be embarrassed by.

sharing a bottle of scotch is what straight frat boys do when they feel their gay side creeping in. pun intended.

I've been going for years. I think you've read too much into what he wrote. It's more just a silly fun time. If you're weird about it, then by all means, you probably shouldn't go and make it weird for people that are just there to have fun and watch a celebration free from judgement.

Maybe there needs to be a new type of emphasis font created that allows people to know you're just having a good time:

"boredom and listlessness can set in. We recommend copious amount of PDA.
<flaming_drag_queen>So, expect some respectful kisses and hugs from boys who like boys who
like girls who like boys (and sometimes girls)—and everyone in between."</flaming_drag_queen>

I think I read exactly what was intended -- an attempt to deflect bad behavior by castigating the victims as intolerant. That is crap. No, a gay guy kissing a straight guy does not make the straight guy gay. If unwelcome, however, it can reveal that the gay guy an ass and an assailant.

yeah, you were right. don't go. you've probably never been drunk at a party and tried to make out with some random chick. hey, living vanilla can be fun too, right? i guess.

You realize the official name of the parade is Chicago Pride Parade? A lot of LGBTQ people are no longer gay.

No, you misunderstand. "Gay" is slang for "Chicago." See, now the headline works again.

For those interested in seeing something more than corporate
floats and fake tans, the Dyke March will be happening in South Shore on
Saturday.