Let's not beat around the proverbial insect-ridden tree. The 17-year cicadas are coming back. Fuck. This. Is. Not. Cool. There are two kinds of periodical cicadas, but they both do the same thing. After their eggs hatch, "tiny ant-like nymphs" bury their way below the ground to feed on plant roots for 17 or 13 years. Then they all simultaneously rise up from the ground in some horror show and shed their skins, mate,... more ›

The Pre-Show Ah, what to say. Everyone looks so...puffy. We're watching WGN because...well, we can't find the remote honestly. 6:10 PM - Do you even have the right to complain about cheesy presenters if you're watching an Oscar pre-show? Isn't that like visting a dominatrix and complaining about the pain? Still, we have a deep burning hatred of Sam Rubin. 6:17 PM - Hilary Swank going against the grain with no cleavage display. Wearing drapes... more ›