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Impersonators Steal, But Not The Show

By Rachelle Bowden in News on Sep 30, 2004 6:11PM

This week has been a rough one for the amateur impersonation circuit here in Chicago. Police are no longer fooled as two members of the Chicago guild gave less than stellar performances this week.

Police say they're getting closer to nabbing Kevin Costner in his role as "The Health Inspector Bandit". A woman has called police claiming to be the man's girlfriend and gave them his name. Christine Baumgartner and Costner just got hitched on Sunday and already she's ratting him out! That's some bullshit. She's no ride or die bitch.

The Health Inspector Bandit isn't actually Kevin Costner, the picture just looks like him. So no need to boycott. Put that "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" VHS back in the VCR and press play. And remember, stealing from the rich isn't really stealing.

Michael MoranYesterday, police charged another man, who works for the city, with four misdemeanor counts of theft and four counts of impersonating a police officer. Michael Moran would show a fake badge at Speedy Car Wash, 5724 N. Lincoln Avenue, and proceed through the car wash for free. The manager of the store was on the lookout when the city refused to pay for Moran's washes claiming his entries in a log book at the car wash were incorrect and not for a Chicago vehicle. Guess what city department he worked for? We'd bet your first guess was right. Think "plagued by hiring scandals." That's right! It's Chicago's infamous Buildings Department.

Also yesterday, Ald. Leslie Hairston called for hearings in front of the city council's Human Relations committee focused on city employment practices and the influence of trade unions. She hopes to have Buildings Commissioner Stan Kaderbek and officials from Carpenters Union Local 13 testify at these hearings.

In the meantime, Buildings Department officials have been re-inspecting over 300 buildings inspected by four former inspectors who either resigned or were terminated earlier this month and late last month after questions about their work histories. Good job Kaderbek! Now how about a review of the resumes of all the inspectors in your department? Thanks, Sam!