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Patrick Daley Enlists; Michael Sneed the New Paige Wiser?

By Margaret Lyons in News on Nov 30, 2004 11:19PM

Patrick Daley, looking a lot like Zack Morris; image: Chicago TribuneMayor Daley's son Patrick is enlisting in the Army's regular airborne infantry, according to Michael Sneed, the…gossip columnist. Scoopsville!

Patrick, 29, admits to the Sneedster that he's "on the old side to go into the military but not too old." He attended West Point after he graduated from high school but left 14 months later. (He eventually graduated from U of I.) "…The values of West Point are still with [him]," though, and now that he's older, he's better equipped to understand selflessness and virtue. Mayor Daley and his wife are supportive but understandably nervous.

 'So what turned him around?' 'So did Patrick Daley have the biggest collection of G.I. Joes?' 'So is he scared?' 'So how do his parents feel?' So many questions, so poorly written. Image: Sun-Times.Attention Michael Sneed and her editor(s?): you need to read this. No, seriously. Your article is 775 words, which cannot possibly warrant a four-section breakdown. It's usually impossible to identify one winner for the Most Irritating Part of a Michael Sneed Column award, but we think subhead abuse is today's star. (Last week's winner of TMIPoaMSC: alerting us to Jaleel White's birthday.)

But back to story at hand. Eric Zorn (who's giving away books, btw; keep your eyes on the Notebook if you want one) paints a slightly different picture of the young Daley; Patrick's not just a man eager to serve his country but as a guy who, if he wants to get into the family business, has some biographical tidying up to do. According to Zorn, the "public story line of [Patrick's] life so far…has been marked by a very low-profile obscurity punctuated by negative news stories." Ouch, Eric. Ouch.

Regardless of Patrick's past shenanigans—wait, doing foolish, dangerous crap when you're young harms your political career? wha?—the guy enlisted…in the military…during a war, and that's an incredibly fucking brave thing to do.