Cookies Recalled Because They're Like Tobacco?

By Sam Bakken in News on Dec 21, 2004 8:24PM

You know those hip "Truth" ads that pit urban, activist youths with attitudes against the evil old white men of tobacco? (Doesn't the government subsidize tobacco farms?) Last year one of the group's commercials was for joke product "ShardsO'Glass Freezer Pops" and at the end it said "What if all companies sold products like tobacco." Apparently hip, urban, activist youths don't know about question marks.

Anyway, apparently there is a non-tobacco company that is selling a product similar to tobacco. It's Archway Cookies. They are recalling some of their 10-ounce Archway Holiday Cashew Nougat Cookies because they may contain ShardsO'Glass. The cookies are made in Ohio and Indiana, but are sold nationwide.

Only the holiday cookies with the following 2005 dates have been recalled: Feb. 20, Feb 28, Feb. 29, March 3, March 4, March 5, March 10, March 11 and March 24. The product code, which can be found on the right-hand side of the package, is 2750002054.

If you bought any of the cookies with these markings, either eat them with a glass of extreme caution (that "cashew" may be made of glass) or return them for a refund.

News of these glass cookies has put us in a cautious mood. Like Chicagoist, you're probably likely to indulge over the holidays. But don't let the fun, presents and merry-making distract you. Please don't let yourself forget that tobacco, alcohol, drugs, lightning, fire, pollution, violent video games, homicide, driving, ignorance, racism, pornography, packs of rabid dogs, packs of rabid terrorists, unprotected sex, [insert something dangerous here] and cookies (even sans glass) are all bad for you.