Skipping New Year's?

By Scott Smith in Arts & Entertainment on Dec 30, 2004 2:20PM

This is usually the place where we’re supposed to tell you what excellent bands or movies are playing on New Year’s Eve. But you probably already have your plans sketched out, right? You don’t? Dear God! Don’t you know you HAVE to have major plans on New Year’s? It’s the end of the year! Therefore, you have to be at some huge party with lots of people, find someone to kiss at midnight, and have an Absolutely Amazing Time or your life will suck and you’ll have terrible foot odor for the rest of the year.

Or maybe we’re wrong.

It is possible to spend the entire evening in and not immediately become a social pariah as a result. So take the night off and cuddle up with someone you love (we hear Jack Daniels and Johnnie Walker are available). Make snide comments at Regis Philbin as he hosts New Year’s Rockin’ Eve in Dick Clark’s absence. Or you can engage in a little schadenfreude as fictional characters have crappy New Year’s Eves in the following movies:

Strange Days – Nothing makes New Year’s Eve more exciting than trying to solve a grisly murder. Yet another in a never-ending series of cinematic attempts to make people think that Juliette Lewis is a sex symbol.

200 Cigarettes – You know your life is rough when you get dumped by Janeane Garofalo and turn to Courtney Love as a stabilizing influence.

Four Rooms – Never has so much talent been put to so little use. The story of a hapless bellboy and his crazy misadventures (we liked this movie the first time when it starred Jerry Lewis). Released during Tarantino’s but-what-I’d-really-like-to-do-is-act period. Yet another in a never-ending series of cinematic attempts to make people think that Madonna is an actress.

Holiday Inn – Starting an inn that’s only open on holidays seems a bit like opening a McDonald’s that’s only open on Thanksgiving but whatever. The movie features three different New Year’s Eve celebrations so there’s probably a drinking game in there somewhere for you. Also the answer to the trivia question “What’s the first movie to feature Bing Crosby singing “White Christmas?”

When Harry Met Sally – Uh…actually this one turns out pretty good in the end. Except for the really big shoulder pads everyone is wearing.