Billy Gates To The Rescue!!!

By Sam Bakken in News on May 19, 2005 6:35PM

Chicago Public Schools are like an alcoholic uncle that can't keep a job, feed his kids, or get them to school. And now Bill Gates is like the grandma that, because she feels bad for the kids, continues to enable her son by lending him money and buying grocery store gift certificates for the family. The uncle has four kids and only two of them have enrolled in college—one of them didn't even graduate.

The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation are expected to announce today that they'll donate another $11 million dollars to improve Chicago's high schools. That's almost $42 million donated to CPS from the foundation since 2001. Part of the money will go directly to CPS and the rest will go to a number of other groups that will use the money to create new charter schools.

Now don't get us wrong grandma Billy, thank you. We just think it's a little pathetic that we can't fund or improve our schools our own damn selves. And if we continue to count on grandma, we may never get our shit together.