How to Get a Girl Back?

By Rachelle Bowden in News on Nov 29, 2005 10:00PM

David Rodriguez got dumped by his girlfriend and instead of using some classic, romantic method of getting his ex-girlfriend back like buying her jewelry or telling her how much he loves her or filling her house with roses, David decided that kidnapping some kids and performing a satanic ritual was the way to go.

The 18-year-old lovelorn Chicagoan has been accused of kidnapping a 6-year-old girl and her 8-year-old brother to perform the demonic ritual intended to bring back his former lover. Rodriguez and his 15-year-old buddy snatched the kids outside a South Side library and intended to carve a pentacle on the girl's chest. Since they only needed the girl for the ritual, they let her brother go and he ran off and told people on the street about the kidnapping.

Rodriguez took the girl to his house then headed out to the store to get some candles and incense, you know.. for the ritual. The police busted in and got the girl out and then they arrested Rodriguez when he came home from his little satanic ritual shopping spree. Luckily the girl was unharmed, because if getting kidnapped isn't enough of an emotional scar, we're guessing getting a pentagram carved into your chest at age 6 is a physical scar that would last a lifetime. Not good.

Rodriguez is being held on a half mil bond and is charged with 2 counts of aggravated kidnapping.

Our tip to those who want to win their exes back with a satanic ritual: Make sure you go shopping FIRST. Time is of the essence and a little mid-kidnapping shopping excursion might buy the cops enough time to bust the whole thing up. Kidding. Of course. We're happy that both kids were returned to their family quickly and safely.