Hey, Stud, You Think You Don't Need Mistletoe Anymore?

By Rachelle Bowden in Miscellaneous on Dec 8, 2005 6:46PM

Some people might say it's Christ that's missing from Christmas, but what really worries us that's missing is the mistletoe. ABC7 did a recent piece on how one of the oldest holiday traditions is fading out of sight. When was the last time you saw a sprig of mistletoe hanging up somewhere?

Back in the day, Chicagoist used to host drunken holiday parties and the mistletoe was an integral part of them. Hang it up, someone doesn't see it or forgets about it and accidentally stands below it... that's pretty much open territory for anyone to go kiss on them, no excuse needed.. except "you're standing below the mistletoe."

A local wholesale florist told ABC7 that years ago they used to sell thousands of pounds of mistletoe, but these days they sell just a trickle of what they used to sell. It's a shame. Why the abandonment of one of the holiday's best traditions? You don't need an excuse for a free and easy kiss anymore? You think you're doing ok on your own, big boy?

Do us a favor, ok? Hang some mistletoe this year. Revive the tradition. Make people kiss, it's fun! And here's a secret tip: Nobody really even knows what mistletoe looks like. Just hang any leafy, green shit you've got around the house. Got some extra rosemary in the fridge you need to get rid of? Nail it up to the doorway, and wahlah, mistletoe. And, more importantly, people kissin!