Penile Enlargement Surgery not Bombs

By Alicia Dorr in News on Apr 6, 2006 7:53PM

There was no telling what could happen when sex and terrorism meet—until recently. And what happens is just pure preposterous irrationality.

The search for weapons of mass destruction can stop now that the man who sent a mail bomb to his Chicago surgeon is off the streets. There's nothing more annoying than when a truck tips over on the highway or something and the news says it wasn't due to terrorism (because that's automatically what we were thinking), but this is actually about WMDs. The man pleaded guilty to sending the weapon to the doctor after his penile enlargement surgery was botched. He called the police before the package arrived and it was dismantled before doing any harm.

What "botched" means, we really don't want to know. What we do want to know, however, is why his sentence would either be two years for sending a mail bomb—or 4-to-8 years for "using a weapon of mass destruction."

What? That doesn't seem right. So, there's the makings of a civil war going on in Iraq and a former world leader on trial in his pajamas for something we would have slapped 4-to-8 years on someone for? We're confused, and maybe scared. And sort of giggling self-consciously.