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Peace Out, Gun, Momma Needs a New Pair of Shoes

By Alicia Dorr in News on May 1, 2006 8:28PM

The Chicago Police Department set a goal of 500 guns for the gun return drive held this weekend. They figured around that number of people would take city up on their offer to trade in guns—no questions asked—for a $100 debit card.

By the time all the guns settled, though, more than 3,000 guns were returned to 23 churches around the city. We’re not talking about just any kind of guns, either, they were talking about AK-47s, TEC-9s, sawed off shotguns and many other weapons that are named things that could make a grown man piddle.

Pretty much the whole damn story of the day makes us well up like we did when we watched Hallmark commercials in the 90s. Apparently the “Don’t Kill a Dream, Save a Life” drive, which got its legs from the wave of shootings in the city within the last few months, wasn’t supposed to start until 10 a.m. but had a line of people at least an hour earlier. The program, which was (basically) sponsored by Jewel and Chase Bank, was aimed at giving people a choice when they felt they had none.

Now, if you don’t mind, we’re going to go blubber in the nearest broom closet and mumble to ourselves about hope for awhile. And maybe piddle a little.