If Deer Overrun, Go for the Gun
By Alicia Dorr in News on May 18, 2006 7:10PM
Even though it is clear that the only worthwhile game to hunt is obviously humans, people all over the country still hunt. In fact, it seems some of it is actually necessary. So, hunters, you’re in luck, because the Chicago Park District is about ready to allow specific hunting in one park. We’re out of luck, though, because it’s not the most dangerous game, it is deer.
So for those of you who miss the feeling of going out into the quiet woods and falling asleep in a tree while wearing neon gear a’la CTA employees, you may, once again, be able to prove the size of your man (or woman) hood. Deer have apparently “overrun” the North Park Village Nature Center at Pulaski and Peterson. We decided to reuse that word because it sounds totally ridiculous.
But, yes, 20 (yes!!! 20!!!) deer now frolic wildly in the preserve, and of those nearly half (yes!!! HALF!) are due to give birth soon, which would double those numbers—especially because does often carry twins (yikes!!). While the animals are probably getting ready to spar for the space, state wildlife experts are saying that there is only enough room for, like, "a" percent of those deer. Naturally, the solution is to bring out the guns! But in all seriousness, there apparently isn’t an alternative, as these animals have increasingly become hazardous to humans and other wildlife in the area. Again, with the guns.
No details on when you can get your hunt on—with permit, of course. In the meantime, we’ll be sitting back wondering whatever would happen if another species totally overran Mother Nature’s limited space and became hazardous to other animals. Hmm.