This Week in Stupid

By Joanna Miller in News on Sep 1, 2006 7:23PM

If there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that stupid is an equal opportunity employer. Stupid doesn’t care how old you are, where you live or how much money is in your bank account. Stupid comes in all shapes and sizes.

• A 19-year-old French resident has been charged with misdemeanor disorderly conduct after telling security officers at O’Hare Airport what turned out to be a very bad joke. Lucas Garcia placed a “tightly wrapped” plastic bag on the conveyor belt to be X-rayed, but officers were unable to determine its contents. They asked Garcia what it was, and he told them it was a bomb. The package actually contained a mini-glass beer bottle attached to a bottle opener.
• Last Friday, several Rolling Meadows residents noticed a 75-year-old man walking around naked in his backyard. John R. Howe, a registered sex offender, was sweeping his deck and waving to neighbors in the buff. Police arrested Howe, and he was charged with one count of disorderly conduct. He is due in court next month.
• A Chicago man faces charges of unlawful entry and assault on a police officer after getting into a fight with a Secret Service officer at the White House. Rob Rankin, 25, attempted to get onto the White House grounds through the gate where ticketholders are admitted for public tours. The officer stopped Rankin and he was arrested.