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This Week In Stupid

By Matt Wood in News on Sep 29, 2006 3:55PM

Oh the schemes people can hatch when left to their own devices. Whether it's a novel way to get even with your neighbor, planning ahead so you can deposit that money you stole on the way home, a scam to rip off an amusement park, or just an excuse to go get a sandwich, there was no limit to creativity in this week's chronicle of stupidity.

Citizens of River Forest who visited the post office Monday afternoon were greeted by a sign saying that the office was closed that day for an hour, because two clerks were on vacation, one was sick, and one had gone to lunch. Also in the news from River Forest this week, a squirrel was said to have been chattering quite loudly outside someone's window.

chicagoist_2006_09_tnt.jpgA Hammond man was arrested Monday for trying to bomb his neighbor's home. The woman heard a thumping sound, smelled something burning, and found a lit explosive on her window air conditioner. In true Looney Tunes fashion, the bomb didn't explode because the woman pulled out the wick in time. She then saw her neighbor, 27-year-old David Michielsen, running away. He was upset with his neighbor because her children had broken his wife's glasses.

A man who robbed a South Side bank yesterday was caught when a dye pack exploded in the $210 he had stolen. It wasn't the ink that led police to Deangelo Wiley though. When the pack exploded, he dropped the money and his personal checkbook. When police went to Wiley's last known address, they found him with dye on his hands and clothing.

Finally, Chicago police officer Tiffany Brown appeared in court yesterday, accused of trying to deposit a fake $1 million dollar check at her credit union last month. A teller became suspicious when Brown told her it was part of a settlement from Six Flags, and because the check was made out of a six-foot piece of posterboard.