Patron Saint of Love 'Em and Leave 'Em
After seeing local newsrooms inundated with Bears "news" stories this weekend, we finally caved. Well, actually, this story is about the Saints, but we're still keeping to the spirit of the game. A linebacker for the unlikely star team got a surprise Saturday when coming out of the Hyatt Regency at McCormick Place: a paternity suit. Danny Clark, who actually started out in the suburbs of our fair city and played at U of I, has been named in a suit filed by Chicago resident Alisha L. Pate. Pate even went so far as to name her three-week-old son Alijah Danny Clark. We don't know if the allegations are true or not, but that takes balls. Pate has also quit her job to take care of the little tyke full-time, putting that many more eggs into one basket.
Hey, this may have more to do with the Bears than we realized. Clark wears No. 54, the same number as our resident babydaddy machine, Brian Urlacher. Urlacher knows well the trials and tribulations of paternity suits, having been slapped with one in July 2005 (and subsequently proved the father). A quick rundown on the situation turned up an unusual Wikipedia entry on Urlacher (see "Personal Life"): "Although Urlacher may appear to be a tool, his teammates often criticize him for not wearing protection while fraternizing with strippers." What's even more remarkable is that not only does it have a reference note, but that reference has nothing to do with strippers whatsoever. We sense a grudge. Anyone know Jay Mariotti's IP address?