Extra, Extra

By Jocelyn Geboy in News on Sep 15, 2007 1:35AM

It's been confirmed. Orlando Jones, John Stroger's godson who avoided being interviewed by the FBI in conjunction with a hosptial shakedown in Las Vegas, committed suicide on a Michigan beach.

Not only is this a tragedy for the people involved, but we're really disappointed with the Jesuits, as well -- The Rev. Donald McGuire has been convicted of molesting two boys in Wisconsin, faces a new accusation of sexual abuse, and his Jesuit religious order privately settled yet another complaint, the Chicago Sun-Times has learned. Yet the Jesuits, known as the Chicago Province of the Society of Jesus, haven't stopped him from dressing as a priest and won't say whether they're seeking to have him laicized -- removed from the priesthood.

Yeah, we're going to beautify the city, but who really gives a rat's ass about the river? Most of the water in the Chicago River is treated sewage that is loaded with bacteria, but officials contend they shouldn't be forced to clean up the waterway unless a newly commissioned study finds people are getting sick from the murky flow.

We happen to think this is much better than instant death ... Kenneth Hansen, a former horseman serving a 200-year sentence for the 1955 slayings of three young boys, a crime often blamed for ending a more innocent era in Chicago, died in prison on Wednesday.

He sounds like our dad when we were growing up. Teenagers already chafing under Chicago's rigid curfew ordinance could face an even shorter leash: Mayor Daley says 10:30 p.m. on weekdays and 11:30 p.m. on weekends "may be too late."

Wow. Makes us realize what's really important. In an radio interview with Mike North yesterday, Cubs outfielder Cliff Floyd said that the grief he felt over the death of his father last month was so deep that he thought of not returning to the team. Floyd expounded on that yesterday and indicated he still might retire after the season.

"El Tinajon" by rachelleb