Your Five SummerDance Excuses Become Riddled with Bullets of Logic and Reason
By Amy Mikel in Arts & Entertainment on May 27, 2008 6:39PM
Chicago SummerDance 2008 kicks off on June 12, and this year’s calendar looks to be stocked with a great variety of dance, integrating popular offerings like salsa and swing with Transylvanian Folk Dance and the Cajun Two Step.
Do you always make weird excuses not to go to SummerDance? So does our editor, Margaret. After the jump, we address her, and perhaps your, absurd concerns.
1. I will be embarrassed. I am a garbage dancer.
We won’t trivialize anyone’s paralyzing fear of dancing, but if you are ready to make the leap into public dancing, start with SummerDance. Free dance lessons are followed by an open-floor general dance, and the dance floor is rimmed with seated spectators just resting, lounging, and enjoying the scene. Wander in and out at your leisure. Your stiff hips and plodding feet will also be shielded by the bodies of the thousands who turn out every evening. Plus, no one will care if you are a shitty dancer.
2. I will have no one to dance with.
Usually we crash SummerDance with two accessories: a female friend and a twirly skirt. (Single guys tend to crash SummerDance with the ability to ask an un-partnered woman if they would like to dance.) A lot of people are already coupled up, but SummerDance is a nice way to roam around, meet, and dance with lots of different partners.
3. I … don’t think I like “world music.”
This excuse is completely lame! Look at the SummerDance calendar and pick a day that has music that accommodates your taste: Jazz, Blues, Rumba, Tango, Motown … and the bands are always energetic and fabulously good.
4. The dance lesson won’t make enough sense and I will feel like a big tool.
A lot of these dances have a simple structure. It's like walking; one foot in front of the other. That’s right, Marge! If you can’t grasp the steps during the lesson, think of it this way: the male traditionally leads. If you snag a dance partner who knows what he is doing, you will learn the movement and start to be able to dance the steps. I can’t give any advice to dudes at this juncture; being a woman here is definitely an advantage.
There are a lot of people at SummerDance who are just messing around. Let's reiterate: no one cares how well you dance.
5. Does SummerDance get sketch? The last thing I want to do is overcome my fear of bootyshaking only to be molested by some sweaty old guy.
Ahhh, every woman’s concern. How many times have you felt like “going dancing” and before you know it, you are at some club fighting off the pelvic-thrusting advances of hordes of horny dudes? SummerDance is surprisingly un-sexual. After the formal dance lessons, things descend into the feel of a block party. Kids running around, couples stepping on each others’ feet, and old people sipping wine out of plastic glasses. All pretense is gone as everyone collectively gets sweaty and tired.
Anyways, we will see you there.
Image via TheMichael