Top Chef Chicago Recap, Part I of Finale

By L. Stolpman in Food on Jun 5, 2008 2:49PM

Welcome to Puerto Rico, Top Chef fans!

We start off with Stephanie arriving at the P.R. airport in San Juan who tells us she has been spending the last few months in Southeast Asia. The envy. It burns. Next is Antonia who reveals her work ethic and child neglect (kidding, kidding). Richard arrives and bluntly states that it is good to see both Stephanie and Antonia and, oh yeah, Lisa will be arriving but really, she's like a vestigial organ that's overstayed its welcome. Lisa arrives with less hair and she gets a nice hug from Stephanie and a pat on the back from Richard.

Quickfire Challenge. The chefs meet Padma and the guest judge, Wilo Benet, chef/owner of Pikayo in San Juan, who looks a little bit like Tom Coliccio minus a soul patch. Of course, any pudgy, white, bald guy sort of looks like Tom Coliccio so, you know, whatever. The chefs must create two fritters incorporating plantains. Padma tells us they go best with a cold, cold beer. Cut loose for 40 minutes (just once, we'd love to have Padma scream, "Allez cuisine!"), Stephanie, Richard and Antonia dive for the plantains while Lisa makes like Spike to check out the proteins. Richard lights the gas stove and is engulfed in flames. It demands a TiVo slow-mo replay.

Stephanie presents Chef Benet and Padma with tostones and seared tuna (with vinegar, red onion, peppers and sugar). She also serves a pork and shrimp fritter with brown butter, lime and basil sauce. Antonia offers up crispy oysters with cilnatro plantain jam. Padma asks if the fritter actually contains plantain and Antonia says, "It'sa inna da sauce!" Next is yellow plantain with spicy slaw. Lisa serves tostones with pan roasted duck and mango papaya salsa. Next up is her sweet plantain, red onion and chorizo fritter with chutney slaw. She calls it her version of a mofongo fritter. Damn, we do love some mofongo. Richard arrives with pork meatballs with ripe plantain sauce. His second dish is green plantain chips with ripe plantain salsa.

Chef Benet thinks Antonia fell short on her integration of the plantains and said the raw plantain's slime in the jam was a turn off. Richard's raw plantain salsa gets a similar criticism. He though Stephanie's balance was great. He also liked Lisa's tostones. Which, as that was typed, did give us pause. Winner is: Stephanie! The crowd goes wild! A rare Quickfire win for Steph! The chefs head off to Old San Juan to eat and drink and watch Padma cut a rug.

Elimination Challenge. There's going to be a garden party at the Governor's mansion. Guess who is going to be catering the event? Tom and Padma tell this to the chefs and then reveal a pig on a platter. Each chef will use a whole pig to create dishes for the event. Then out marches Dale, Nikki, Spike and Andrew. As winner of the Quickfire, Stephanie gets to assign a sous chef to Antonia, Lisa and Richard and she graciously tries to pick people who will work well together. Stephanie picks Dale, Richard gets Spike, Antonia gets Nikki and Lisa gets Andrew. The contestants will butcher while their sous chefs go to the market to get the produce.

At the market, we see a nice demonstration of Andrew's communications with a local woman which consist of hand gestures, saying colors in Spanish and ending all other words with 'o'. Dale grabs some black plantains that he stresses look rotten…but he thinks Stephanie will like them (Ed. Note: Dale's right. Black plantains are very sweet. They just look nasty!). Back in the kitchen, the contestants git to butcherin'. There's a lot of hammering and Stephanie even apologies to her Wilbur, calling it 'buddy'. Awww. It's like eating the family pet. The sous chefs return and everyone is happy with their finds…except Lisa. Two hours of prep before they end the day. As the chefs leave the kitchen, the camera pans over to some pork belly left on a counter with a spice rub…uh oh. That looks like Stephanie's. We whisper, "ohhhhh, crraaappp."

The next day, Dale walks in and says he left the pork belly out on the counter. Stephanie says they must pitch it and she very kindly tells Dale, "That's okay." You know, we were just in Rome less than a week ago and recall seeing a statue of Stephanie in Vatican City because that woman is a saint. Lisa would have served Dale's balls as a fritter. Actually, we'd have been inclined to do the same. However, Stephanie works with Dale to consider the situation and come up with a third dish. The chefs run around, preparing their dishes for the party. Next thing you know, the guests arrive and begin to eat.

Richard's menu: 1) BBQ Pork shoulder cooked in coffee and cinnamon, with braised greens and mango, 2) Pork belly with pickled watermelon, 3) Ham and beans, and 4) Ribs with malta and soy glaze. Little reaction is seen from the judges.

Antonia's menu: 1) Crispy, honey pork belly with pickled sweet pepper salad, 2) Pork sausage with pigeon peas, and 3) Curried pork with pumpkin and yuca. Unclear reaction here, too.

Lisa's menu: 1) Yuca and pork rellena with pineapple mojo, 2) Citrus braised pork belly with potato and plantain mash, and 3) Adobo roasted pork, black bean and onion tostone. Unclear reaction but Tom says, "delicious."

Stephanie's menu: 1) Chicharrones, fruit and prosciutto salad, 2) Coconut braised pork with black plantain pancake, and 3) Pork satay on sugar cane skewer with miso almond sauce. The judges seem to like everything. Padma says the salad is refreshing and Chef Benet says the black plantain pancake is inventive.

Judges' Table: Tom liked Richard's pork belly and Stephanie's chicharrones but was less enthusiastic about Lisa and Antonia. Richard and Stephanie go to the judges' table and are told they are the favorites. Benet loved Stephanie's satay. Winner is: Richard! He wins a 2009 Toyota Corolla. He looks floored. In his head, he thinks, "How am I going to get this off the island?" No worries, dearest Richard, we have them in on the mainland, too.

Antonia and Lisa go to the judges' table. Lisa's hair is new but her sour expression is still the classic she keeps in the closet for these occasions. Gail (hieeee, Gail! We lurve you!) says that Lisa's puree was supah too sweet and that her dishes had more to do with garnish than pig. Benet tells her that her tostone was unbalanced. Antonia served all her dishes on one plate and Gail said they all blended. Her peas were undercooked. Not good. The judges discuss and call back Lisa and Antonia to rehash their mistakes before Padma asks Antonia to pack her knives and go.

We gasp and cover our mouths. In fact, Lisa practically does the same. But Lisa covers her mouth to keep from beaming at Antonia's back as she says bye to the judges. She does, though, genuinely seem surprised. As they re-enter the room to see Stephanie and Richard, Antonia gives the classic jazz hands wave to indicate she is going home. As Antonia hugs Stephanie, she whispers, "Kick their ass." In the stunned silence of the aftermath of Antonia's departure, Lisa looks over at Stephanie and Richard and says with a tinge of snide, "I know you guys are upset that Antonia's leaving but a congratulations would have been a little bit nice." Stephanie apologies and says congratulations. We sort of love that Richard says, "I'm just tired." Ha! Lisa says, "It just makes me feel like you guys feel like the wrong person went home." Wow. Lisa finally reads a room correctly. We love Richard as he says to the camera, "What does she expect? You won the fuckin' bronze medal. Congratulations. There you go."

Stay tuned, Top Chef fans. Next week we will have a winner!