The Chicagoist will be launching later but in the meantime please enjoy our archives.

For That Recipe That Needs A Lovin' Spoonful...

By Chuck Sudo in Food on Nov 21, 2008 5:00PM


The Food Chain was first with this, and it's been like staring at a car wreck for ever since. Looking for a salt substitute? Then here's a cookbook for the truly indiscriminate omnivore:

"Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients - you will love this cook book!"

I'll never look at Egg Drop Soup the same again.

Faced with the prospect of eating something with that in it, I'm faking a food allergy and cockpunching the chef. Book like this calls for a theme song when making the recipes. Here's the perfect choice: