Oprah Watch: Home Makeovers, "Blue Zones" and Lame-o Favorite Things

By Ali Trachta in Miscellaneous on Nov 28, 2008 7:30PM

Oprah kicked off the holiday season of giving on Monday with free home makeovers for viewers care of Thom Filicia of Queer Eye and Oprah Show live-in lover Nate Dreamboat Berkus. First Thom scrambled to complete a home renovation in 42 minutes while wearing a child-size plastic fireman’s hat. We thought we were in for a light-hearted show, but it took a tear-jerking turn with Nate’s assignment. Guests Joan and Ken had made an appearance on the show back in September and won the chance to take Nate home for a domestic upgrade. What we didn’t know then is that Joan had been diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer and has little time left to live. She wanted to make sure her husband and sons had a “manly” place to hang out in their house, so Oprah charged Nate with the task of upgrading the family’s unfinished basement into a guy’s wonderland. Some wood paneling, a pool table and autographed photos of dirt bikers seemed to do the trick, and the joy and relief in Joan’s eyes Oprahfied us.

On Tuesday we journeyed with Oprah and Dr. Oz to the world’s “Blue Zones,” which are the four hot spots around the globe in which there are the most people that live to be 100 years old. Our first destination was the Nicoya Peninsula in the Costa Rican rainforest. There, one of the secrets of longevity is the naturally hard water, which contains calcium and magnesium that hardens bones and relaxes arteries. (Should we stop buying water softeners then?) Their youthful vitality also stems from the everyday physical activity involved in living off the land. The next hot spot, Sardinia, Italy, turned out to be our favorite. Their secret? Wine and cheese! Specifically peccorino cheese and goats milk for the Omega 3s, but who cares? We don’t need arm-twisting to down wine and cheese. We’ll do it. To our shock, the third destination was in America: Loma Linda, California. The elderly in this hot spot had similar practices as the other two, but in addition, in Loma Linda there’s a high population of 7th Day Adventists. This sector of Christianity believes, among other things, in a loving and benevolent God who has their best interest at heart, freeing them of the propensity to worry. Say what you will about religion, but that fundamental belief could be pretty soothing. Okinawa, Japan was the big finale, where the citizens live longer than anyone in the world. Their big secret is simple: “ikigai,” or that which makes life worth living. Oh Oprah, you are our ikigai...

Wednesday was the Superbowl of all Oprah shows – FAVORITE THINGS! While normally this show causes the studio audience to shriek, faint and sing the Hallelujah chorus as Oprah gives away extravagant, expensive items, this year Oprah told us she was reigning it in, bringing us gift ideas that cost next to nothing in an attempt to help us still have joyous holidays without going broke. Idea number one was derived from one of the main tenets of Oprahism: gratitude. As a new twist on the old White Elephant game, the Oprah Camp suggested making decorative boxes with friends and exchanging love notes instead of gifts, telling each of your friends why you’re thankful for them. Memorable, and probably more heart-warming than an exchange of a bunch of chotchkies. Oprah then welcomed a mom who showed us another creative use for boxes: using them as memory chests for your adult kids full of old photos, pictures and memorabilia from their childhood. Cute idea, but if you haven’t been hoarding your kids’ stuff since they were born, you’re S.O.L. Then Oprah and friend Cristina Ferrare spent about 30 minutes showing us how to cook a turkey, corn bread stuffing and pumpkin chiffon pie…which was nice, but didn’t really save us any money. C’mon Oprah, where are all the thrifty tips you promised? Finally, in a grand act of laziness, she referred us to Oprah Magazine for more money-saving gift ideas. WTF, Oprah? We had our pens and papers ready to jot down penny-saving pearls of wisdom but ended up pretty disappointed with this show. All we learned was that if you need to cut back this year, tell your friends you love them and hit up Boston Market if you can’t afford the many ingredients needed to make Cristina’s dishes.

Thursday’s and Friday’s shows were repeats: a follow-up on Oprah’s favorite giveaway ever and a rerun of Al Gore’s Inconvenient Truth presentation. After all the leftover turkey we’ve eaten this week, we hope Bob Greene will soon be making an appearance.