Chicagoist's Survival Guide To Dark Lord Day

By Chuck Sudo in Arts & Entertainment on Apr 24, 2009 7:00PM

Tomorrow marks the annual release of Dark Lord, the Russian Imperial Stout from Three Floyds. The video above, filmed at last year's event, shows the waiting line at 9:30 a.m., 90 minutes before the beer officially went on sale.

I've voiced my complaints about Dark Lord Day before and it isn't limited to the long lines to buy the stuff. The folks at Three Floyds, beer geeks who just have to have the beer (guilty!), and scalpers who know a sucker when they see one have hyped the event to such a degree the past two years that the brewery has had problems accommodating the sheer numbers of people who show up. To the credit of Nick Floyd and company, the concept of selling "golden tickets" to people who want to buy Dark Lord was a step in the right direction; the proceeds from the sale of those ducats went to charity. That only wound up increasing the artificial demand for the stout. Even though the golden tickets say that the holder is guaranteed the ability to purchase Dark Lord, I'm still convinced that there will be some surly ticket holders tomorrow leave Munster empty-handed.

It's that myopic focus on acquiring Dark Lord that keeps some from truly enjoying the experience. It's best to remember that Dark Lord is just a beer and the festival is a show of appreciation from Three Floyds to its customers. And they do know how to throw a party. After the jump is a list of things to follow to maximize your ability to have fun at Dark Lord Day.

1. There's more beer there than just Dark Lord: Personally, I'm looking forward to getting my hands on a couple bottles of Popskull, brewed in collaboration with Dogfish Head. Both the Floyds and Dogfish's Sam Calagione are insane brewers that brew extreme beers. My mind simply reels at what they've done with Popskull. Other guest beers include Stone Levitation and ‘06 Brandy Barrel Double Bastard, Struise Black Albert, Firestone Walker Abacus and Union Jack IPA, Fouders Cerise. Flossmoor Station, Goose Island brewpub, and Rock Bottom are also sending beer to Munster. This is as good of a segue as any to...
2. Attendees, for the most part, are friendly: Sure, you want to pound Northwest Indiana's finest trade school dropouts into fine powder when they're walking up and down the line trying to sell you Dark Lord for $60. Don't let that deter you from going out and having a good time. There's a group that sets up on one of the picnic tables called the League of Extreme Beer Drinkers that does nothing but share and trade beers with other attendees. You can meet some pretty cool people at Dark Lord Day, trust me. Plus, you're drinking very hoppy beer all day. Beer is related to hemp, which is supposed to make you mellow. You're more inclined to meet wonderful people and socialize when you're mellow and not stressing over buying a beer.
3. Come for the beer, stay for the bands: A stage is set up in the brewery for bands to play. it isn't an exaggeration to refer to Dark Lord Day as "Heavy Metal Parking Lot: Munster." Last year, Sybris played a set that nearly melted my face.
4. DON'T buy Dark Lord from scalpers: For some of you this might be easier said than done. I'm speaking from experience when I tell you that nothing will make you happier than to roll home at the end of a day and see some punk ass barely out of his teens trying desperately to unload his haul of a beer that might help him grow pubic hair if he took a sip. Three Floyds has come down against the scalping of golden tickets, although they admit there's nothing they can do. If you need Dark Lord that bad, you'll be able to find it later.
5. Take a bus to Munster: There's a lot of beer at Dark Lord Day. Some bars charter buses to transport customers to the event. LUSH Wine and Spirits has one that's already full. Drinks Over Dearborn and Sheffield's have also chartered transportation to and from the event; call for details.