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Windy City Rollers: Manic Attackers Capture The Ivy King Cup

By Jen Hazen in Arts & Entertainment on Jun 22, 2009 4:00PM

It was a Saturday night of grand slams, fast jams, and a sauced bachelorette party in the stands at the Windy City Rollers fifth season championship match for the Ivy King Cup. Scrappy underdogs the Manic Attackers brought down the house at the UIC Pavillion as they fought to steal the prize from 2008 title defenders, the Hell’s Belles. The festivities opened with a charity match between randomly sorted skaters from the Double Crossers and The Fury playing each other to raise money for Tahirah “Tequila Mockingbird” Johnson, a former Windy City Roller skater who suffered a spinal cord injury in August 2007. With the help of lead jammers Peg Legs and Eva Dead, the White Zombies chewed up and spat out the Dark Side 72-30.

Pre-game festivities continued with tunes from the gold sequin-clad Polkaholics, as well as the bachelorette party sitting next to Chicagoist who decided to give us gifts. EiC Marcus was crowned with a twinkling tiara and I got to wear a shot glass necklace and a pin that read “Bad Girl.” We were so ready to derby.

The first period of the championship match found the Helle’s Belles (in red) quickly racking up points thanks to lead jammers Varla Vendetta and Athena DeCrime, while kick-ass blocker Megan Formor plowed through the pack to clear the way. But the crazed Manic Attackers (in blue) held their own with lead jammers Beth Amphetamine and Ying O’Fire—the ultimate chicks on speed—passing the pack and circling the track for points. HB led at the halfway 74-47, showing why they were the 2008 Ivy King Cup Champions.

The second period found the Manic Attackers out for blood, bruised booties, and the win. Hell’s Belles’ key players sat in the penalty box as lead jammers Ruth Enasia, Ying O’Fire and Malice With Chains scored 14-, 15-, and 10-point jams, respectively. Unfortunately, HB’s jammers Athena DeCrime and Shocka Conduit just couldn’t make up the point difference.

In the end, the underdog Manic Attackers took a big bite out of the Hell’s Belles with a final score of 137-115 to end the WCR interleague season. And Chicagoist’s bachelorette party festivities ended with a score of 6—1 flashing toy diamond ring, 2 episodes of the bachelorette stumbling onto the track, and 3 full-shot, no bra top drops. No, we’re not kidding.

The All-Star season for the Rollers gets under way next week and their next home bout will be July 25th against Philadelphia.