Elmhurst's Egregious Eye-Roll Epidemic

By aaroncynic in News on Jul 21, 2010 7:40PM

2010_07_21_eyeroll.jpg Though the definition of the term “disorderly conduct” can be nebulous, the charge is usually reserved for people misusing fireworks, crowbar-wielding motorists, property damage and threatening children. Officials in suburban Elmhurst however, might like the charge to stick to miscreants who show their sarcastic displeasure with a roll of their eyes.

Yes, the town we last heard from for being a hub of porn is now trying to outlaw eye-rolling. According to Trib Local, Darlene Heslop was ejected from a June 14th committee meeting for sighing and rolling her eyes. The city’s finance and council affairs committee, who are now considering creating a “disturbance and disorderly conduct” violation, then directed the City Attorney to check into state statutes regarding disorderly conduct and disruptive behavior.

Among many other potential violations, Illinois state law defines “disorderly conduct” as “A person (who) knowingly does any act in such unreasonable manner as to alarm or disturb another and to provoke a breach of the peace.” Heslop, who was not arrested or charged with anything, would like Elmhurst officials to define the matter, to “have a better understanding of the open meetings act and its meaning and to understand what disorderly conduct is.” City Attorney Don Storino will report back to the committee on January 26th, but doesn’t believe eye rolling will be a law enforcement issue. “It’s not in any way a punishable offense by a fine. It’s a matter of decorum.”