Why We Can't Have Nice Things: Parking Lot Edition

By Marcus Gilmer in News on Sep 21, 2010 8:20PM

Deerfield Police are searching for a female driver who acted quite unladylike in a parking lot recently and are mulling over possible charges. At around 6:20 a.m. on the morning of September 13, a woman pulled into the parking lot of Takeda Pharmaceuticals in Deerfield, got out of her car and proceeded to "defecate and urinate on company property." (What is it with the suburbs and poop recently?) Anyhow, the woman then tried to leave but not without hitting a responding security guard's car and then running two red lights as she made a hasty exit for the interstate. And it was gloriously captured on a surveillance camera perched above the parking lot. The Deerfield Review says charges against the woman should she be tracked down include "public indecency, leaving the scene of a vehicle damage crash, disorderly conduct and failure to obey a traffic control device."