The Chicagoist will be launching later but in the meantime please enjoy our archives.

What To Give Mayor Daley on His Record Setting Reign?

By Chuck Sudo in News on Dec 22, 2010 7:00PM

Mayor Daley, making the sad trombone face; Photo by our old friend, WBEZ's Kate Gardiner

As we mentioned in passing yesterday His Elective Majesty, Richard M. Daley, will surpass his father on Sunday to become the longest-serving mayor in the Chicago history, with five-plus months left to add to the record.

No matter how you look at it (and we do so with a jaded eye) 21 years as mayor of a major metropolitan city is quite an achievement. It requires a passion for the job, the belief that no one can do it better than you, and running for re-election largely unopposed for most of that time.

We're sure Daley will have his celebrations when he passes the milestone this weekend, both private and public. But what do you give the mayor to honor such an achievement. DePaul already dedicated a building after him and wife Maggie yesterday, the first of many buildings that will be dedicated in his name in future years. Here at Chicagoist, we were thinking of something more tangible. Like mementos from his time in office as Spencer's-style gag gifts. So we sat down and came up with a list of gifts that could be included in an eventual Richard M. Daley Public Library.

  • Rob: A bronzed chunk of Meigs Field runway.
  • Betsy: Honorary diploma from Chicago's worst performing public high school; a trophy with a parking meter on top.
  • Benjy: A plaza with an abstract sculpture of his own.
  • Kim: A prescription for Plavix with unlimited refills.
  • Aaron: A nice red truck, hired just to drive him around; tickets to the 2016 Olympics; a new bicycle (since he has been nice to cyclists).
  • Tankboy: A lifetime pass to all Ticketmaster/Live Nation concerts in thanks for trying to squash the independent music scene in Chicago with the proposed promoter's ordinance.
  • Tony: Since he's actually been pretty supportive of gays and lesbians, a drag queen makeover! Although those damn rainbow pylons in Boystown (which he supported) are a bit...much.
  • Chuck: The outgoing members of City Council who haven't moved to other branches of government, to agree with everything he does in retirement.
  • Soyoung: A "#1 Stunna" hat.
  • Josh: Thicker skin. Recycling bins for his home.
  • Kevin: A kick in the royal jewels.