The Chicagoist will be launching later but in the meantime please enjoy our archives.

It's New To Us: Ridiculous Wine Tasting Notes

By Anthony Todd in Food on Mar 15, 2011 5:40PM

Photo by gt3photography
A friend sent us this, and it made our day. Have you ever read a wine menu and laughed at the language? Since we've spent some time with good Sommeliers, we know that a true wine expert can find thousands of flavors in a beverage, but for many of us, sometimes it seems a bit much. Well, now you can generate your own insane wine tasting notes, right from your desk. That cheap white from last night? "Classic but equally french-oaked Sauvingnon Blanc. Whispers of root beer, sassy seawater and corpulent raw egg. Drink now through never." That french red hiding in the back of your wine rack? "Raw but equally lacking in character Rhone. Shows opium, overdone pixie stick and total absence of Mars bar. Drink now through 2005." Be sure to click "extra silly."

Print some out and bring them, next time you go to dinner. You will definitely impress the wine snobs at the table. In fact, if you want to have some fun, play a game and see how long it takes for your friends to realize you are just blowing smoke.

Originally posted on Diner's Journal.