Indiana Man Arrested, Threatens To Eat Cops, Their Kids And Dogs

By Chuck Sudo in News on Jan 14, 2012 8:30PM

We said earlier this week that crime stories are funnier when they come from Indiana. To wit: an Indianapolis man threatened to eat the cops who arrested him, their children and their dogs after he was caught stealing a car from a gas station.

Paul Brock stole the car from a Speedway gas station. The owner of the car and manager of the Speedway, Crystal Cochran, said she left the car unlocked and running so it would warm up. Brock seized the opportunity to steal the car and, when police stopped him at another parking lot, the fun began.

Brock kicked a police dog in the head before he could be arrested. He was then taken to a hospital, where he threatened to "hunt down every officer involved in his arrest and eat their children, dogs and their entire families." Would it surprise anyone to discover Brock's blood alcohol level was 0.26 at the time of his arrest?

We thought not. Regardless of Brock's BAC, he shouldn't have done the crime if he can't do the time.