Conan Gives Schoolkids The Blues, Brings Back The Masturbating Bear, And Mrs. O'Leary's Cow Jumps Over The Bridge

By Chuck Sudo in Arts & Entertainment on Jun 13, 2012 2:00PM

Conan O'Brien continued his week-long stay in Chicago with an episode that dug deep into the city's urban legends and cliches, while still providing some hearty belly laughs in the process.

In one sketch, O'Brien noted the Cubs are one of a handful of Major League Baseball teams that don't have a mascot. (Obviously Coco never met Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers.)

Anyhoo, some of O'Brien's proposed mascots included a computerized mobster named "HAL Capone," the one waitress in Chicago who hadn't slept with former Cubs cocksman Mark Grace, and a Cub who can't hit a piñata; only one of these is grounded in reality.

O'Brien has always had a good connection with children and used them to great effect in sketches. This sketch, where he writes blues songs with students at Francis Xavier Warde school, is no different. We're looking at edamame with a new perspective this morning.

O'Brien and his crew like to bring out revered characters on road trips like this. The Chicago Theatre crowd was treated yesterday to an appearance from the Masturbating Bear.

Finally, in yesterday's State Street Bridge jumps Team Coco batted .500. A replica of the Picasso Statue found a final resting place in the murky polluted depths of the Chicago River. While Mrs. O'Leary's Cow—which even an honorary Chicagoan such as O'Brien should know is a myth—once again acquitted herself with aplomb.