Ditka Proclaims He's Still Ditka After Suffering A Stroke

By Chuck Sudo in News on Nov 17, 2012 7:00PM

By now most of you have heard that former Bears coach Mike Ditka suffered what was called a "mini stroke" Friday and that Ditka declared himself fit as a fiddle afterward, leading to multiple, "Ditka didn't have a stroke; the stroke had a Ditka" jokes on Twitter and "Stop it!" memes. Even Sun-Times columnist Rick Telander took time away from obsessing about when Skynet will become sentient to add to the Legend of Da Coach.

Just thinking of Mike Ditka, vulnerable, is hard enough. Not since his heart attack in 1988 had it seemed the Bears’ then-head coach had any weaknesses. Of course, nobody has ever counted the broken bones or torn ligaments or replaced hip sockets that Ditka has incurred and counted them as real wounds.

Ditka shrugs such things off. Nuisances. Why, one time his just-surgically repaired hip popped out of its socket on the golf course, and da Coach lay down on the fairway and let his playing partner, former Lions middle linebacker Mike Lucci, yank it back into place.

‘‘He’s Iron Mike,’’ his agent Steven Mandell said Friday. ‘‘So we just figured he’s made of iron.’

The stroke was major enough that Ditka had to be hospitalized after he experienced problems speaking and with his hands while playing cards at a suburban country club. The stroke was also major enough that Ditka will not be able to handle his ESPN NFL game day duties, where he's a pregame analyst.