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Madison Officials Still Targeting Snuggle House [UPDATE]

By Lisa White in News on Dec 10, 2013 10:20PM

UPDATE, 5:35 p.m.: Thanks to an update from a Facebook reader, we now know that the Snuggle House officially closed their doors for good last Friday. You've won this time, Wisconsin. The people of Madison will have to find their own snuggle options the good old fashioned way. Thanks for the tip, Christine.

The city of Madison, Wisconsin is back in the news continuing their crusade against all things paid cuddling. We reported earlier this year about the Snuggle House in Madison having their opening delayed due to push back from local concerns. Anti-cuddler assistant city attorney Jennifer Zilavy is pushing for more regulations surrounding the Snuggle House and gave the Associated Press this gem of a quote:

“There’s no way that (sexual assault) will not happen. No offense to men, but I don’t know any man who wants to just snuggle.”

Let that sink in. She basically stated that no men in the world want basic human contact, they want it all to lead to sex. And if they don’t get sex, they will sexually assault someone for sure. Hey men, you should take offense to this statement.

Zilavy was also quoted her first thoughts when she heard about the Snuggle House:

“OK, this is going to be a place of prostitution.”

With her totally sensible logic, apparently a lot of legitimate businesses could be considered places of prostitution. Watch out folks, cuddling 100 percent leads to prostitution and sexual assault! It’s like some bizarro logic from the town in Footloose.

Zilavy is currently drafting regulations that would allow health inspections as well as create licensing requirements for the business. The owner of the Snuggle House has also offered to watch with her security footage of snuggle sessions and view client rosters. No word on if they will snuggle while doing so.

As the Associated Press points out, “snugglers contend touching helps relieve stress.” We hate to bust the AP’s chops, but we’re pretty sure anyone who receives a nice long hug from someone after a stressful day can agree that touch helps relieve stress. Also the importance of touch and affection have been studied at great lengths. Sure it isn’t for everyone. If we’re dropping $60 per hour, we’d rather have a massage than a cuddle session. But if it helps someone out and is a legitimate business that isn’t breaking any laws, leave the cuddlers alone.

The owners of the Snuggle House have gone to extreme lengths (security cameras, panic buttons in each room, background checks on workers and clients, strict rules) to help ease the fears of Madison officials, who seem dead set on closing the business. The AP even reported issues figuring out if the business was open now for normal hours. Seems like Madison just isn’t ready for the dark underbelly of the cuddle party world. Make sure no one tells them about yoni massages and the fact those are legal in multiple places or you might have to grab the vapors.