Holiday Gift Guide For People With Mouths
By Sponsor in Food on Dec 5, 2014 6:00AM
This post is a sponsored collaboration between Mouth.com and Gothamist staff. Spend $100, get $15 off at mouth using code Gotham15. Now through the end of the year.
One thing no one talks about before the holidays is just how much you're about to be a guest in someone else's home. Your boss's cocktail party, meeting the parents, raging at your brother's first Thanksgiving, whatever—you owe it to your host to think beyond drug store flowers and $8 wine.
Mouth.com has plenty of gifts to choose from year-round, but below are some offerings for those battered souls in your life who write timetables and plan menus, all for the pleasure of watching you drop crudités on the rug and slur through jokes by the glowing holiday hearth.
The Big Cheese, $110. There's nothing you can do to really be ready for your first big holiday dinner. Forgetting the ice, running out of silverware, dropping the main course out of the oven—it happens to the best of us. If you wanted to be a literal hero, you could, take some weight off your host's shoulders and bring a cheese tasting for the first course. Set out on a slate board, it'll be so stunning that no one will remember the lumpy gravy that's definitely coming. And if you're extra nice, show up early and let your host take credit for the spread.
Raise the Bar, $140-$235. You know the worst thing about hosting a party? Stocking the bar, only to have nothing left when your degenerate friends leave. Help your host replenish their supply with not just the basics, but artisanal basics—the stuff they'd probably never buy on their budget. There comes a time when everyone grows up, and that time is when vodka doesn't come from a plastic jug.
Holiday Cookie Plate, $55. Since the dessert table was ransacked—not that pumpkin pie everybody breathed on for hours is all that appealing—here's some treats they'll actually get to eat. This set has peppermint chocolate sables, almond ginger shortbread bites, speculoos cookies, hazelnut whisky sandwich cookies, and stroopwafels—help them hide it in a closet before they have to share with the party
I'll Take Manhattan, $120. The most perilous of all guest situations is the party hosted by someone who can't handle a single deviation from The Plan. This is a person who unwinds only after everyone's stumbled home, the kitchen is spotless, and the couch is perfectly spruced for lounging. It's a safe bet they're a connoisseur of the finer things and life, and the ultimate reward for a connoisseur is the manhattan. It's a complex cocktail that's at once sweet, sour, biting and smooth, and everything needed to sip the stress away is right here.
T-Day: Part II, $50. If your host talked about brining, seasoning, stuffing, and glazing their bird for weeks before Thanksgiving, give them something that'll take their leftovers to the next level. Bacon mayo, sweet and sour wino-nion jam, and all the fixings will make for the best turkey sandwiches ever.
The Indie Christmas Stocking, $60. If you know your host to have a fondness for sleighbells and trimmed trees, bring a little yuletide cheer in a stocking stuffed to the gills. They'll appreciate the festive creativity in this mix, from cinnamon caramel made from goats milk to the spicy, crunchy apple pie chocolate bar.
The Holiday Cocktail Party Collection, $105. Visiting parents who aren't yours is always extra stressful, especially around the holidays. Whether they're your significant other's or your best friend's, break out this spread after you get settled and head downstairs to mingle—it'll go well with that lovely chardonnay Mom probably set out to help the ice breaking.
The Perfect Bloody Mary, $155. If you're spending the night, maybe morning drinks is the way to go. Let them do the honors of throwing the best holiday party ever while you plan to wake up early, make some eggs and bestow the gift of the ultimate bloody mary. This kit has two different mixes, white whiskey in addition to vodka, and bourbon smoked salt for the rim of your glass.
The Greatest Guest, $150. If your host already has it all, budget isn't an issue, and you want to go down as The Best Ever, you can always ply them with this assortment of snacks. It's an indulgent mix with enough gourmet loot to remind them of your perfect, perfect manners until New Year's.
Really, you should start thinking about that gift list. Don't let last year happen again, when you may or may not have gotten your dad a tie and your girlfriend a fruit bouquet. How about something from Mouth.com instead?
Bring Home the Bacon, a sampler with maple bacon pops, bacon mayo, bacon jam, bacon... you get it.
Jerky Every Month, perfect for the protein fiend.
Sundae Best, with butterscotch sauce, malted hot fudge, goat milk caramel, and tons more for the best bowl of ice cream ever.
Pantry in a Bag, the most luxurious way to stock the shelves in a new apartment.
Peck of Pickles, if you know someone who can't resist that briny crunch.
Chocolate-Covered Deliciousness, an almost scary collection of cookies and other treats cloaked in chocolate.
The Peanut Butter & Jelly Taster, for someone who wants to revisit their youth in sandwich form.
Bourbon Every Month, a subscription for those who prefer their brown liquor comes from Kentucky.
The Meat Market, for the charcuterie-lover in your life.
Cookies Every Night, a subscription that'll send 30 different varieties each month, so you can put on your onesie and not miss a single night of milk and cookies.
Mouth.com is a purveyor of indie food and tasty gifts that's focused on finding you the best, most delicious food products, all while helping indie makers grow their businesses. Spend $100, get $15 off at mouth using code Gotham15. Now through the end of the year.