The Week That Was: Rahm It Through
By Staff in News on Jan 4, 2015 10:00PM
So we know Rahm Emanuel doesn’t like to be constrained by rules—unless they are the sacrosanct debt structure rules imposed on him by his friends on Wall Street.
This personality trait might just come back to haunt him in regard to the Obama Presidential Library, though.
Mayor MyWay thought it was beneath him to go through the public process of acquiring the land for the University of Chicago site, and assumed he’d just ram it down our throats as a fait accompli, as he’s wont to do. That means the former chief of staff to the man the library honors is potentially fumbling bringing this honor and enormous rasher of bacon to the man’s political hometown. That doesn’t exactly fit in at all with his narrative of being the guy who isn’t always cuddly, but gets things done.
There are two competing places outside of Chicago. One is Hawaii, which was his childhood home, but has plenty of tourist lures and little need for economic development anchors. The other is New York. Fuck New York.
Speaking of fumbling, a discussion about the Bears as the good NFL teams begin the playoffs is about as desirable for most fans as sharing an open-mouth kiss with Shane MacGowan.
But ‘tis the season. Jay Cutler has avoided the carnage—for now—and will be one of the building blocks for or impediments to the next iteration of the Monsters of the Midway. My vote is to hire the Ebola Czar to coach the Bears next. The U.S. hasn’t seen a case since the month he was appointed. And if Cutler truly is a cancer in the locker room, who better than someone with experience in healthcare?
The Bears were about the only people in Chicago not displaying violent behavior— at least not on the field—recently. Even as our mayor tells us crime is under control, there have been huge brawls at Navy Pier, and most recently, McDonald’s. Hey, we all like the McRib, but let’s keep it civil her.
And while we’re on the subject of civility, it’s not often that The Week That Was breaks news—and "by not often," I mean "never"—but then again it’s seldom that Chicago news involves Maury Povich.
We’re all familiar with the woman Rahm cajoled into fawning all over the .50 cent hourly earnings increase with which he is gracing the working class this year under his minimum wage plan. But WTW readers—yes, they do exist—have inquiring minds and, it seems, too much time on their hands. Could she possibly be the Sharita who sought answers on this segment from the Maury Povich show? And, if so, couldn’t Rahm have stayed local and picked someone who asked such poignant questions on the Jerry Springer Show before he left town?
And that was The Week That Was...
—Tony Boylan
"The Week That Was'' is a satirical, yet informative, look back at recent news. We consider it to be mostly accurate.