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Some Jerk Stole $70,000-Worth Of Wisconsin Cheese Off A Trailer

By Rachel Cromidas in News on Jan 27, 2016 9:43PM

A selection of great American artisan cheese. Photo by Erika Kubick

Wisconsin police are on high alert after someone stole $70,000 worth of cheese from a 54-foot long trailer last Friday. Police in Germantown, Wisconsin are searching for the robbers.

Police recovered a semi-tractor used to cart off the trailer full of cheese, and the trailer, empty of its delicious golden cargo, Friday morning. The trailer was taken from D&G Transportation, at N118W18574 Bunsen Drive, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.

Punsters at Jezebel are hoping some gouda citizens will help ricotta the criminals and solve the queso, and we admire their optimism. They also have some suggestions for what the cheese bandits can do with their haul, from swimming in a pool of it like Scrooge McDuck to carving some ambitious cheese art. But, being as we are a bit closer to the Wisconsin border than them, and more learned in the ancient traditions of Wisconsin cheese, we know exactly what these Monterey jackers plan to do: live out their days gorging on fried cheese curds.