Don't Go Swimming In The Lake Today, Or Nature Will Crush You
If you were planning on swimming in Lake Michigan Thursday, make a new plan. Swim risk will be "high" from 11 a.m. Thursday morning through late evening, the National Weather Service reports—which means you can expect deadly waves and currents in the lake. The NWS also forecasts danger at local piers and breakwalls.
This is especially ominous because, though the NWS said it would stop screaming all-caps forecasts at us starting May 11... it's still screaming.
I don't know about you, but when I see that at a .gov URL, I picture Rahm running through town screaming. Sort of like a modern Paul Revere.