The Chicagoist will be launching later but in the meantime please enjoy our archives.

JackHammers Offer Blago A Deal He Shouldn't Refuse

By Marcus Gilmer in News on Feb 11, 2009 6:00PM

2009_02_11_joliet.JPG Now that he's been removed from office, won't be receiving any unemployment benefits, needs a new lawyer, and may not be able to land a book deal, the time has come for former governor Rod Blagojevich to figure out what the next step in his career will be. Fortunately for him, Joliet's minor league baseball team, the Jackhammers, have offered Blago a steal of a deal to play ball for them. Blago would be considered a "rookie" on the team's roster and thus receive a rookie's salary, but, hey, better than what he's making now.

JackHammers Executive Vice President and General Manager Kelly Sufka said in a statement, “We figured with his vast knowledge and love for the game he would be a great addition to the team. Wally Backman, manager and former major league player, will do what he can to get him as many at-bats as possible, but he may have to work hard in spring training to find himself a regular spot in the line-up.”

According to the JackHammers:

The JackHammers are making the governor the regular rookie offer with a few extras. In addition to receiving his Northern League salary and a free host family, the JackHammers will offer incentives in his contract unlike any ever offered a rookie player! First, the team would like to have a Blagojevich bobble-hair night, where 1,000 bobble-hairs (the hair instead of the head will bob) will be given away and the Governor will throw out a first pitch. The team also plans on having special “golden” seats available for purchase as well as a few other fun events to fill out the evening. Never in JackHammers history has a rookie player been offered a promotional item in their likeness.


Travel arrangements will be made exceptionally comfortable for Blagojevich. He’ll have his own seat on the luxurious coach bus during the JackHammers road trips. As is the case usually for only team veterans, Blagojevich will get his own room on the JackHammers overnight trips to Kansas City, KS; Fargo, ND; and Winnipeg, MB.

The JackHammers play in the Northern League of Professional Baseball and their 96-game season goes from mid-May to late-August. Do it, Blago. Just f'n do it. [via NBC 5]