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The Tale of Patton Oswalt, Moto, "Christmas Shoes" Cookies and the Frosting of Life

By Karl Klockars in Food on Mar 17, 2011 7:20PM

Comedian Patton Oswalt is a noted foodie, and has been known to talk about everything from KFC to Chicago's better restaurants at length. But we didn't know that one restaurant was a fan of him until we stumbled across an interview a few weeks ago from the WTF With Marc Maron podcast, discussing a dish featuring an unusual topping that is usually only made by hand.

Fine-dining dishes have found their inspiration from everything from childhood memories, to emotions, to seasons of the year. We never thought one would be inspired by a comedy bit, but when Oswalt visited Moto late last year, that's just what they did. The Feast made short mention of the meal a few months back, but we wanted to get the details behind this particular dish.

'Twas a night around Christmas when Oswalt sat down to dine with the mad scientists of Moto, and little did he know that the kitchen had created a dessert around Oswalt's bit about the "Christmas Shoes" carol. Chef Richie Farina explains: "It was a slow night around that time so we made chocolate-mint flavored [shoe-shaped cookies], and we took the edible paper and made pictures of high heels. We started out by playing the song, then put the shoes in front of him."

We won't recount the entire bit, but the part in question goes a little something like this: "That's when it starts to sound like a scam. Like, the kid and his dad are just going to different stores, the dad's out in the parking lot in a beat up Chevy Nova with a trunk full of women's shoes, they're just covered in jizz, and he's like 'Listen - you go in there, you've got a to trick a guy into buying them! I can only jerk off to these if you trick a guy into buying them. That's what Vietnam did to me."

Farina continues: "He was taking pictures of everything and people kept trying to guess what it was based on, since it was around Christmas time. When it got to the [right] point in the bit, we pulled out the ...white, creamy frosting to represent [the] dad's part in the bit...and squirted it all over the shoes. That's when he realized what we were doing."

All of this is a long way of saying that yes, Virginia, there really was what Oswalt described on Twitter as "vanilla curd Dad's Jizz frosting." He followed that up with "Moto. Fucking. Rules." On the podcast he described the moment as "great, it was really flattering" and pointed out that the chefs were very proud to have made a dish based on one of his non-food bits. In light of this dish, one might be forced to view every future cupcake and pastry in a different way. Or, it might spur a purchase/re-read of this fine tome.

Either way, our Christmas tale is told, Godblessus, erryone.