UPDATE: Alright, we admit it, we were fooled. Seems this whole story is bunk. Apologies all around and now we can go back to loving Kanye unabashedly. Thanks to commenter John R who pointed this out to us. more ›

Yesterday, I lamented the further fall of the teen cop impersonator in the wake of his latest arrest for stealing a car. At the time, however, the details weren't known. But now, more information has come out and we may be dealing with a con man the likes of which we haven't seen since Lyle Lanley. The teen stole a Lexus car from a dealership by dressing up in a suit and convincing the salesman he was in the market for a car. The car had a dead battery which was recharged by the salesman. The salesman than returned the charger to its proper place, but when he got back to where the car had been, it and the teen were gone. more ›

My bosses aren't going to like this but I don't care. Stop reading this. Whatever you're doing right now - including reading this website - stop. Start fake coughing. Now go to your boss and tell him/her you're sick. Now go outside and stay outside all day. Highs will be in the mid-to-upper 60s with nary a cloud in the sky. This is what Spring in Chicago is all about, people. Why are you still inside reading this? Go. We'll be here when you get back tonight. You can read us then. Go. Just get the heck outside. I know I am... more ›